Things you'll never hear in an Everton match.

[ToffeeBlueNose]

My pukka pie was nice and glad to see chang is only £1 a bottle

 

[malfosse]

Now we've gone 1-0 up, we should bring another defender on.

 

[ToffeeBlueNose]

i love this pillar somebody stuck in my way

 

[jsweeney17]

Pity we are 2 down - lets hope the reds win today !

 

[Summerskin]

"I'd rather be Benjani than a red".

 

[hudd101]

'Fellaini easily shrugged off the ball in centre midfield'

 

[sexualchocolate]

Discovered by the Germans in 1904, they named it San Diego, which of course in German means a whale's vagina.

 

[EFC David]

Everton are playing 4-4-2 today.

 

[Baines' left foot]

"Everton's number 9 is really looking on form today".


FFS!!

 

[Nashtbs]

I wish the announcer would call Jags YAG YELKA too.

 

[bluejock]

CAHILLLLLLLLLLLLL

 

[jtl60]

"Richard Wright would have saved that"

 

[ToffeeBlueNose]

great goal by stuart barlow

 

[blue61]

"Surprising substitution from Moyes there as he accidentally brings on the guy who always stands in the wheelchair access area by the church, with his shorts on whatever the weather."

 

[EFC David]

"I feel we should groundshare with our red friends, we could call it Goodfield!"