The point I'm making is, why is there a reluctantance to go to the public to decide 'how?'Because parliament can't command a majority for any given outcome, in a second referendum it would be for the government to propose a way forward that goes to the people instead of parliament. So at that point May's government, or whatever government exists at that time, would put forward that proposal and put it against remain.
May's deal is fairly clear in terms of what it wants - no customs union, strike trade agreements, end free movement, have a backstop on the island of Ireland until a revised solution is made.
Parliament has failed, so it can't dictate ten different options to the public - it has to be a simple, two way choice. And the only one on the table right now and agreed with the EU is May's deal. The only other realistic option is no deal, and neither the UK nor the EU will countenance that.
Given the situation as it is now and parliament having the final say, it would surely have to be the will of Parliament vs the will of the people (which I again see no democratic issue with). And the choices as you have rightly described Remain vs the Government agreed relationship. But, May's withdrawal agreement is just the agreement to leave, it does not give an indication of future relationship.
But, there has been ample opportunity to have a number of options on a ballot for a referendum on the future relationship. It's just been ignored and rejected on numerous occasions.
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