Small update and maybe some advice if anyone is still following this ridiculous story of mine!?
Well, today i well and truly stood up for myself. The ex was meant to bring me my bike out of the shed yesterday but she didn't. She was then meant to bring it this afternoon but instead, i got a message saying your bike (£350 worth) is out side the front. Better come and get it before it gets robbed!
That was the moment i stood up for myself and thought enough is enough of this bitchy attitude making everything 50 times harder than it ever needed to be. So i said that since the split, my life has been turned to crap and i've had to rearrange things, do things and adjust everything so i can stay living around here for the sake of the baby.
Then i told her that as she wanted the split, she wanted to jump into bed with a fella within a week or two and her life has now changed that it's time she rearranged her life to suit that. Told her without a car (remember she took her 2nd car back the other day) i won't be taking the baby to school or having her on only the days that revolve around her job. Time to move stuff around for today's busy "Single" mum.
She of course flipped, called me everything, SH*t dad this, pathetic man, idiot, lowlife all sorts. She desperately was trying to get me to admit i refused to get the bus which isn't at all what i was saying. i kept saying that until i can buy a car, things need to change."So admit now that you're refusing to lower yourself to get the bus and take the baby to school" my reply was "I never used the words lower myself,and as a fully grown adult what i choose to do regarding how i get around town and my travel arrangements are totally my choice".
Aaaanyway, after lots of insults and "Fine, i'll get the solicitors involved, go to court and you won't be seeing the baby again" i kept my cool, called her bluff and said, OK, that's your choice. See you in court.
She is selling her other car, i made her a monthly offer that i can afford. She turned it down, just to be awkward. Worked out a tenner less a month as she is paying for it. Kept saying no. She said she will quit her job because I refuse to take the baby to school etc etc. Again, i kept firm and called her bluff.
Ok i said, that's your choice. All i said was you will have to arrange for the baby to get to school another way until i get a car.
Long story short....stuck to my guns knowing full well she wouldn't quit work and go to court. Eventually after many awful insults she accepted my offer on the car. I will probably buy it and give her a cheap monthly payment, can take the baby on days out and to school, she can keep her work shifts and i get a to pay a lot less in petrol, tax and insurance!
It sounds so petty and from her side, it was. I kept it mature and straight down the line. Gave her the options and that's it. She tried many times to make it hard. using the baby as a weapon. I kept telling myself don't bend over to this. i didn't, now things are going to happen on my terms not hers. it'll all be amicable and flexible from my side but also firm when i need to be. Time to get my own life on track now and do things for me a bit more.
She told me last week that she split up with her fella, said she's on her own now. She went on to tell me earlier during the insults that she is still seeing him and she lied about splitting up. She is making a fool out of herself. She couldn't handle not being in control today. She hated it. You know you are making an impact when the insults fly. also, lies like that i just find cringey.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanyway, i'm now going to have to arse about with the car insurances and that due to the swapping of the cars etc. Does anyone know a way i can do that and avoid admin fees? Trying to keep costs down and i don't need a fee for no reason.
Also, i'm keeping her car insurance in my name as it's cheaper for her, would it be cheaper to put the other car on my multi car policy or get a separate one?
I know it's all sounding petty and daft but i couldn't take anymore insults and walking all over me all the while she was having it all on her terms. I had to put an end to it.
TL;DR: I'm a low down, pathetic sh*t dad but now (may) be able to buy a car so i can do the school run!
. Joking aside I've always had a low confidence about my appearance and hate having photos taken as I can't look at myself without thinking about how ugly I am and how others must see me.
