Gwladysstreetlad
Player Valuation: £50m
Just posting in here to vent because this place saved me from losing my mind last year when I had a cancer scare. I don't like sharing my problems as a rule but the kindness I've been shown on here before makes me feel ok about it. Basically my Mrs has had a mental breakdown, she had issues with her phone and that morphed into her being convinced that she'd been hacked and had "lost everything", all her savings, the tickets to stuff she wanted to see, the lot. She's been a wreck ever since. She was hardly sleeping or eating and was talking about not wanting to be here and that I was her only motivation to be alive. I stayed with her none-stop trying to get through to her but nothing worked (I went over a hundred hours without sleeping), we got docs coming out, the lot, but ultimately her care entirely fell on me. She was refusing to take meds and it was taking me three hours a night to get her to. In the end she got sectioned. Seeing her go in so scared was the worst moment of my entire life. I felt (and still do) like a total failure of a man and partner for not being able to help her or protect her, and I feel selfish that I feel this way, because its not about me. I'm trying so hard to be strong but I just feel wretched. I rarely cry, but there hasn't been a moment since she went in that I haven't felt on the verge of tears. I don't know what to do. I know she feels betrayed that I didn't stop her going in and that hurts me more then I can put into words. I'm not even sure if we have a future together anymore. I want us to, I love this woman, but I really don't know. I'm just tired, I'm tired of feeling so helpless, I'm tired of feeling sad, and I'm of always being tired. I'm determined to stand by her no matter what until she is well enough to he home and is in the right place to have a truly honest talk about what happens next but I feel absolutely wretched right now. I'm walking around like a zombie, with a fake professional smile on my face feeling utterly dead inside.