Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

[coollino]

I did ask but he never said anything about it. He just said he'd call me in 2 weeks to see how I am.

Sorry for the drama mate

You can get therapy on the NHS fairly easily, there is a wait but it's no where near as long as they advertise it. You can apply online, have a Google

Scroll down for the 'talking therapy' button

Find NHS talking therapies for anxiety and depression

If you live in England and are aged 18 or over, you can access NHS talking therapies services for anxiety and depression.

www.nhs.uk

 

[GoldenToffee]

Should be booed from now on.

 

[Brett Angell Delight]

If anyone has any advice or tips on lowering the anxiety, stopping the shakes and keeping a bit of a decent mindset I'm all ears.

I woke up and I can't stop shaking

Hey man, I’ve just caught up on the thread and I’m sorry for all that you’ve been going through.

I’ve had some issues myself regarding anxiety over changes and stuff, and so naturally I’ve read a few self-help books and consider myself an expert in the matter now!

In my case, certainly, my issues arose from me projecting a “worst case” outcome whenever a potential change arose. In your case you might focus on being without somewhere to live, or ending up somewhere worse and more expensive, etc. Firstly you need to acknowledge that these are just *some* of *many* possible outcomes, and that there are just as many if not more scenarios in which everything is better once the dust settles.

As others have touched on, another good idea is to break it down into manageable chunks and deal with one at a time. “Tomorrow I’m gonna browse places to let and not stop until I’ve shortlisted 10/15/20”, etc. You’d be surprised at how one positive step in the right direction can change your whole mindset regarding the task at hand.

This one will sound cheesy and I still struggle, but I really urge you to look into mindfulness meditation. Set aside 3 mins to start with, before you get stuck into whatever your task for the day is, and just focus on nothing but your breath. If your mind wanders, just shake it off and refocus; don’t scald yourself for doing it wrong or failing or whatever. I can’t tell you how much this has helped when I feel like I’m really spiralling.

Finally, and again I know I’m parroting at least one other poster here but there’s so much good advice in this thread that it’s hard not to: Be cool to yourself, man. Progress throughout the next month, and life in general is never linear. You’ll set goals and occasionally you’ll drop the ball. Shake it off and get back in the saddle. You’re not wrong, bad, or a failure, you’ve just been put in a rough position and you’re puzzling it out as best you can.

Rooting for you mate. I look forward to your updates.

 

[MrD]

Hey man, I’ve just caught up on the thread and I’m sorry for all that you’ve been going through.

I’ve had some issues myself regarding anxiety over changes and stuff, and so naturally I’ve read a few self-help books and consider myself an expert in the matter now!

In my case, certainly, my issues arose from me projecting a “worst case” outcome whenever a potential change arose. In your case you might focus on being without somewhere to live, or ending up somewhere worse and more expensive, etc. Firstly you need to acknowledge that these are just *some* of *many* possible outcomes, and that there are just as many if not more scenarios in which everything is better once the dust settles.

As others have touched on, another good idea is to break it down into manageable chunks and deal with one at a time. “Tomorrow I’m gonna browse places to let and not stop until I’ve shortlisted 10/15/20”, etc. You’d be surprised at how one positive step in the right direction can change your whole mindset regarding the task at hand.

This one will sound cheesy and I still struggle, but I really urge you to look into mindfulness meditation. Set aside 3 mins to start with, before you get stuck into whatever your task for the day is, and just focus on nothing but your breath. If your mind wanders, just shake it off and refocus; don’t scald yourself for doing it wrong or failing or whatever. I can’t tell you how much this has helped when I feel like I’m really spiralling.

Finally, and again I know I’m parroting at least one other poster here but there’s so much good advice in this thread that it’s hard not to: Be cool to yourself, man. Progress throughout the next month, and life in general is never linear. You’ll set goals and occasionally you’ll drop the ball. Shake it off and get back in the saddle. You’re not wrong, bad, or a failure, you’ve just been put in a rough position and you’re puzzling it out as best you can.

Rooting for you mate. I look forward to your updates.

Thank you. I do imagine the worst in everything. I've been listening mindfulness stuff this past week. It's still new and seems a bit silly but I do know it will work. I just have to stick with it....

And stick with moving forward.

 

[Brett Angell Delight]

Thank you. I do imagine the worst in everything. I've been listening mindfulness stuff this past week. It's still new and seems a bit silly but I do know it will work. I just have to stick with it....

And stick with moving forward.

I’m in the same boat mate, so let’s keep each other accountable!

 

[Hinchcliffe's Corner]

If anyone has any advice or tips on lowering the anxiety, stopping the shakes and keeping a bit of a decent mindset I'm all ears.

I woke up and I can't stop shaking

Hi D, I've been reading through the thread and your posts and I can relate with a lot of what you've said.

I feel like the Dr may not quite understand how bad you have it. Obviously I'm just some melt on the internet with no formal qualifications, but I wouldn't use or ask for benzos, I would be mentioning citalopram, they have literally kept me alive for a decent while now. They balance you out, you feel mellow, they stop the anxiety and shaking. They take a couple of weeks to kick in, but once up and running you no longer get the mood spikes and anxiety swings.

You need to go easy on yourself too. It might not seem like you're doing much, but going to flat visits and any other social interactions drain that battery in a big way, if you need to rest or have an afternoon nap, embrace it, be kind to yourself, understand that your mental health drains your physical self too, walks might feel like hard work to you because your body is constantly active and draining.

 

[riddick]

Dad passed away Wednesday. Birthday was yesterday. Wife and I have been fighting tooth and nail. This sucks. Wife and I doing a bit better but... the amount of people who knew what happened and have said FA has been pretty sad to see...

 

[Rita_Poon]

Dad passed away Wednesday. Birthday was yesterday. Wife and I have been fighting tooth and nail. This sucks. Wife and I doing a bit better but... the amount of people who knew what happened and have said FA has been pretty sad to see...

That's rough. rip the old man.

 

[SJB]

Dad passed away Wednesday. Birthday was yesterday. Wife and I have been fighting tooth and nail. This sucks. Wife and I doing a bit better but... the amount of people who knew what happened and have said FA has been pretty sad to see...

Sorry for your loss mate, and sorry it's happened so close to your Birthday. I'm glad you and the Mrs are doing a bit better, sometimes the stress and rawness of a situation can lead us to bicker or strike out at those closest to us.

As for people going quiet… yeah, that stings. Sometimes people don’t know what to say and end up saying nothing, but it still feels like being left out in the cold. You’re not wrong to feel hurt by it.

 

[larbert toffee]

Dad passed away Wednesday. Birthday was yesterday. Wife and I have been fighting tooth and nail. This sucks. Wife and I doing a bit better but... the amount of people who knew what happened and have said FA has been pretty sad to see...

Sorry about your dad, hope you and your wife can sort things out.

 

[riddick]

That's rough. rip the old man.

Vietnam veteran who did 2 tours, was one of the first classes in the nation (US) for physicians assistant. Was exposed to Agent Orange during Vietnam so had necrosis in his legs. Simply couldn't lift his foot up enough and tripped on the door sill and got the patio breaking his neck. Such a stupid [Poor language removed] way to go. I spoke to him earlier in the day and was pissy with him because of what my wife and I am going through. He said to his wife that he knows marriage is hard but he really hopes we make it because he honestly thinks we are perfect. We both have the whole gallows humour that few do these days.

I know your didn't ask for anything extra but I just wanted to talk in to the void. Apparently nobody else really cares.

 

[WilliamBoo]

I went on Thursday. He wouldn't give me anything. I have eosinophilic asthma. He said any type of beta blockers or similar isn't good for me. He gave me 25mg antihistamines to take before bed to make me drowsy.

My family care but they're very much, you've just gotta get on with it and don't get it.

You use corticosteroids very often? Sometimes the anxiety and shakes are for excessive use. In the other hand, having high eosinophils in blood can make feel you sick too

 

[Rita_Poon]

Vietnam veteran who did 2 tours, was one of the first classes in the nation (US) for physicians assistant. Was exposed to Agent Orange during Vietnam so had necrosis in his legs. Simply couldn't lift his foot up enough and tripped on the door sill and got the patio breaking his neck. Such a stupid [Poor language removed] way to go. I spoke to him earlier in the day and was pissy with him because of what my wife and I am going through. He said to his wife that he knows marriage is hard but he really hopes we make it because he honestly thinks we are perfect. We both have the whole gallows humour that few do these days.

I know your didn't ask for anything extra but I just wanted to talk in to the void. Apparently nobody else really cares.

Others do care. They do.

I had a moment when a kid I knew hanged himself a few years back, I didn't know where to put it. Some kind ears and hearts on here helped me through.

Important thing from here is to try to take the sting out of the hurt, the shock of the immediate injury has a domino effect, and that could be why you are lashing out at one another.

I'm not saying bury it.

Believe it or not, I have quite a dark sense of humour. We are all conditioned different. Please don't give up on others, and try not to give up on yourself. Grief is a swine. But time does allow us to put it in an envelope and park it. Hurt will hurt forever, but it doesn't have to destroy us.

It's ok to be vulnerable, to be at a loss. We have to know it to be able to help others up. It is the saddest part of life.

 

[MrD]

You use corticosteroids very often? Sometimes the anxiety and shakes are for excessive use. In the other hand, having high eosinophils in blood can make feel you sick too

I'm using them less and less, but for years I was blasting them and they did make me feel like I'm about to explode

 

[degsy]

Vietnam veteran who did 2 tours, was one of the first classes in the nation (US) for physicians assistant. Was exposed to Agent Orange during Vietnam so had necrosis in his legs. Simply couldn't lift his foot up enough and tripped on the door sill and got the patio breaking his neck. Such a stupid [Poor language removed] way to go. I spoke to him earlier in the day and was pissy with him because of what my wife and I am going through. He said to his wife that he knows marriage is hard but he really hopes we make it because he honestly thinks we are perfect. We both have the whole gallows humour that few do these days.

I know your didn't ask for anything extra but I just wanted to talk in to the void.

Apparently nobody else really cares.

We care.