Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

It is now 4 months since my daughter last cut herself and she has just had her first scar removal session. She has over 40 cuts on her arms and 20 on her legs. Most are just self harm, but a couple of the deeper ones are from genuine suicide attempts.
She started college at the start of the year, but pulled out after a week or two. She said it was too stressful for her, but despite it being 40 degrees all week, she went to college wearing long trousers and a jumper as she was ashamed of her scars. I take that as a good sign as she is now considering what people think of her, which means to me that she does actually care.

The past few weeks have been the first time in a couple of years where I am starting to think I may outlive her.

This is heart breaking mate. I have a little girl and can't stand to see her upset over anything, let alone the serious issues that a teenager/young adult has to face.

I hope your daughter gets herself sorted. PM me if you ever need to chat.
 
Interesting articles making the rounds about the rise of stress related absenteeism from work and the problem of so called presenteeism and leavism (where workers repeatedly take annual leave days to cover for not feeling mentally well enough to attend work). Apparently a great number of the line managers polled said they felt inadequately trained to spot and tackle mental health problems at work.

I bet most of the employers these managers work for are in the public sector. My suspicion is that the root problem is people are promoted to managerial level when clearly they don’t have the necessary basic attributes such as good people skills! See it all the time. This will continue to be the practice because the public sector doesn’t pay the money required to attract good managers so has to continually promotes from within, often putting ill equipped and ill suited people in supervisory roles. It actually doesn’t make good economical sense this. Imagine how much of the estimated billion pounds lost to stress related absence could be reduced by paying a decent rate for managerial positions thereby attracting decent managers?

From my experience of working with lots of HR departments and monitoring sickness trends and causes, a good manager makes a massive difference between a mental health employee coping or not coping at work. Training is only one aspect in making a good manager but you’ve got to have at least a basic level of people skill and capacity for empathy that a lot of well-heeled public sector managers in particular just don’t have! Good managers who support and promote good mental health in the workplace is the start needed to change the very culture of looking after mental health in the workplace and remove this entrenched societal stigma about mental health illness.

Rant over :)
This is so true and so right. In my experience of the public sector, they rarely get the right people in as managers because they promote people who are good at the day job and are not necessarily good managers. There is also the complete lack of understanding that giving somebody suffering from anxiety and/or depression a warning about their sick absences is actually going to make things worse not better. It's like pouring petrol on a fire. Now, the person with anxiety will be worrying about what will happen if they go off sick again- which makes their anxiety worse and invariably leads to more time off.
 
I've got a review with my doctor tomorrow..

The citalopram has undoubtedly helped but I think I need to increase the dose as 6 weeks in, I've felt like I've plateaued.

I have definitely picked up tho and daft as it sounds I find myself smiling and laughing randomly.. Which is great

You need to lay off the ale with anti depressants Frank, as it cancels them out.

I`m not saying you need to become teetotal, but it`s pointless taking them otherwise.
 

You need to lay off the ale with anti depressants Frank, as it cancels them out.

I`m not saying you need to become teetotal, but it`s pointless taking them otherwise.

to be honest mate im not drinking like I did...

the way I worked, led to my drinking.

im thinking of a complete career change as the brickying just stresses me out way to much.

ive got some plans and will hopefully be starting a course at the end of the month , which will lead to a whole new career in something completely different
 
ive just had the phone appointment with the doc, who has said to saty on 20mg Citalapram for now, as im just 6 weeks in and so should start to feel the full effects of it now after an initial bump in mood.

he seems to think the stress that my job brings could be a factor in my current mental state. ive never really 'enjoyed' working in the building trade, I know plenty of people do not enjoy their work, but I particulally hate my job, so im looking at a whole new career change..

I will be finding out a bit later if I can get on a course which ive always wanted to do.
 
I can feel the dip coming for me now .
It doesn't be too bad but I know tomorrow and for a couple of days I will just feel like doing very little and avoiding people
Back in my late thirties I went through a similar phase,in the end I just surrendered myself to the fact that this was just me.Once I'd got my head around the fact that sometimes I'd just need to sit a few days out,it slowly started to get better and the times it happened became fewer.Not for everybody obviously but the struggle with your emotional state can the problem,once you give in and accept,things can get better.
 
ive just had the phone appointment with the doc, who has said to saty on 20mg Citalapram for now, as im just 6 weeks in and so should start to feel the full effects of it now after an initial bump in mood.

he seems to think the stress that my job brings could be a factor in my current mental state. ive never really 'enjoyed' working in the building trade, I know plenty of people do not enjoy their work, but I particulally hate my job, so im looking at a whole new career change..

I will be finding out a bit later if I can get on a course which ive always wanted to do.
As far as I understand, anti-depressant doses should just make you feel nit depresses, I don't think you should go down the road of wanting them to make you feel happy all the time - that just isn't a natural part if life. If they did then the happiness would just plateau into feeling normal and you'd be left wanting yet more dose again.

Good positive move to search out a new career - there's no point sticking with a job you don't like if you can get away.

I'd advise against weed spraying as a career though - it's a minefield! lol
 

As far as I understand, anti-depressant doses should just make you feel nit depresses, I don't think you should go down the road of wanting them to make you feel happy all the time - that just isn't a natural part if life. If they did then the happiness would just plateau into feeling normal and you'd be left wanting yet more dose again.

Good positive move to search out a new career - there's no point sticking with a job you don't like if you can get away.

I'd advise against weed spraying as a career though - it's a minefield! lol

I just want to make sure I get the right amount for me, obv you have good and bad days, such is life, the doctor said about that too.. he wasn't going to just up the doe needlessly, he said he would only have said about upping it if I said it had had no effect at all..

my job drives me to drink, it always has, work your nuts off all day, knee deep in crap or up high doing a chimney etc etc, a pint or a few after work was a stress reliever... I don't want life to be like that every day though..

im now feeling ok again and ready to try a new job.
 
Back in my late thirties I went through a similar phase,in the end I just surrendered myself to the fact that this was just me.Once I'd got my head around the fact that sometimes I'd just need to sit a few days out,it slowly started to get better and the times it happened became fewer.Not for everybody obviously but the struggle with your emotional state can the problem,once you give in and accept,things can get better.
Cheers mate. That makes sense .
 
As far as I understand, anti-depressant doses should just make you feel nit depresses, I don't think you should go down the road of wanting them to make you feel happy all the time - that just isn't a natural part if life. If they did then the happiness would just plateau into feeling normal and you'd be left wanting yet more dose again.

Good positive move to search out a new career - there's no point sticking with a job you don't like if you can get away.

I'd advise against weed spraying as a career though - it's a minefield! lol

They’re not supposed to make you feel “ happy “ mate, they’re supposed to make you feel “ normal “ or a close to it as you can be.

The problem with them, is that they’re aren’t an exact science and work differently for different people, so getting it right can be quite hit and miss to start with.
 
They’re not supposed to make you feel “ happy “ mate, they’re supposed to make you feel “ normal “ or a close to it as you can be.

The problem with them, is that they’re aren’t an exact science and work differently for different people, so getting it right can be quite hit and miss to start with.
Think that's what I was trying to say.
 
They’re not supposed to make you feel “ happy “ mate, they’re supposed to make you feel “ normal “ or a close to it as you can be.

The problem with them, is that they’re aren’t an exact science and work differently for different people, so getting it right can be quite hit and miss to start with.
Remember the late 80s and Prozac. This is an interesting read.
https://blog.oup.com/2008/02/prozac/
 

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