Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

Twinkletoes123 · August 4, 2015

I am sorry for unburdening myself on here as I don't post very much, more of a lurker. I don't know where to start with my problems, but I am at the end of my tether at the moment.I'm supposed to be getting married in September but I am in such a state that's all I have on my mind is suicide. The only thing stopping me is my daughter as she only has me in her life.

The Esk · August 4, 2015

Hi mate, firstly thanks for posting, that's a good start and you'll definitely get some good information and opinion here from your fellow blues.

Have you sought any professional help? Several posters on here have for different reasons felt similar to you and they've all eventually sought professional help which has made.things better if not perfect.

So thats the first thing you must do, Doctor, A&E if it is an emergency or phone Samaritans on 08457 90 90 90

If you feel like explaiming more on here about why you feel this way that.will help also.

Good luck, keep posting and seek help. Dont forget you will get.plenty of.support here.too.

chicoazul · August 5, 2015

It's a stressful time with lots of thoughts and apprehension mate. Thing is what you fear in your head won't be the reality.

I'd take Esk's advice and let you posting that be the call to action to get some help or share. Guarantee you will feel loads better.

harris78 · August 5, 2015

Don't think of it as unburdening mate, you are opening up about the feelings you have, that's got to be better than keeping them all locked up in side. Small steps and all that but i would just echo others comments of seeking help from professionals. No doubt it all seems daunting at the moment but it sounds like you are taking the first steps to make you feel better.

No matter what, just remember there are people on here who are happy to listen and help in any way they can. As Michael Jackson would sing 'You are not alone'

BiggyRat · August 5, 2015

Step 1: Start to talk about your issues. Check!

Well done mate. You're on your way.

Now, as for your post, there's not a lot to go on, but that's fine, you need only share what you are comfortable sharing. One thing that stood out for me was your impendiing wedding. That means there is someone, aside from your Daughter, who is willing to share their future with you. Lets call that Step 2: Look for the positives in your life. Check & Check!

Now, your future partner. Can you share with her what you've just shared with us? Remember, your partner is about to commit to you so I'm hoping that she (assumption) is a person you can open up to. I know my Wife listens to me, she slaps sense into me when I need it, but I know I've got her ear.

Talk to her. (again, assuming you haven't already) Let her know how you're travelling. There's no need to alarm her with your darker thoughts but let her in and together you can both chip away at what has gotten you to the end of your tether.

Good luck mate.

roydo · August 5, 2015

Never need to apologise mate. It is a credit to the site and more importantly the contributors in this thread, that you feel that you can post.

Good luck, read what a few lads have suggested, and let us know how things go. Sure it will all turn out fine, even if it might not feel like that now.

Number_25 · August 5, 2015

I'm not even drunk, but here goes.

I'm not sure if I'm depressed or not, which usually denotes that I am. My family have a strong history of depression throughout, and I'm worried that I may be suffering with it.

I moved to Saudi Arabia in June to work on some research at KAUST, and I've not really gotten used to it. The project is fun, but I'm finding it difficult to get going, and in turn this is making me extremely frustrated. I lost my financing for a PhD back in the UK a month ago, and although I've wrangled a studentship at one University - it's not where I dreamed of being.

My girlfriend is back at her own country, and I won't see her until we both return to the UK in September. I feel like crap and I don't know if I have any way out.

Groucho · August 6, 2015

Feeling bad doesn't necessarily equate to depression,but it's important to nip it in the bud before it turns into it.

BiggyRat · August 6, 2015

Friday week, I'll be free of my oppressive & narcissistic boss! They went to sack me & the Union stepped in & said they might want to consider offering me a package or else.... Company backed down & gave me a choice of demotion or package...I bit their hand off!

So, the lesson here for anyone in the same boat, get representation!!!! You need someone in your corner!

Groucho · August 6, 2015

I'm not a union fan however they do at least mean the little guy isn't on his own. I'm in one. Anyway that's for elsewhere......

I'm glad you overcame your employers efforts to walk on you - this is proof that you can win the battles life throws your way. Take a step back, make a plan and confidence will grow folks.

The Esk · August 7, 2015

@Twinkletoes123 how are things mate?

bizzaro · August 9, 2015

Can you literally list the things that are causing you this 'anxiety' right now?

As its not quite clear why you're feeling this way.

It might help you get it out a little. Might help the serious posters (this thread is a serious thread and users are reminded of this fact by the mods and to treat people with consideration see: @the esk numerous postings) - understand whats troubling you.

No one will be judgemental. In so far as people will listen and try and give you advice.

bizzaro · August 9, 2015

Some people can be victims of emotional abuse from these very same people.

Sometimes the only option is to go 'no contact'.

Thats the only way some abusers can be dealt with. Its more difficult of course if they are family members.

Often said abusers are the first to 'play the victim' and to vilify. Such cases are very hard to untangle. But such disfunctional emotional abusers do exist. They take things to the extreme of everyone else you may have encountered before. Rarely feel 'shame' and literally seem to think they can get away with anything the like.

COYBL25 · August 9, 2015

Coming into this late, as I've been away. If you feel more comfortable elaborating in private please feel free to PM me mate ?.

As a long term sufferer of anxiety problems I know how things can quickly spiral and lead to the point were you feel there isn't a way out.

You're not alone mate.

DualityNSNO · August 11, 2015

Hello friends,

Me again here.

Been feeling down quite a lot again lately and just came around to posting this here as a form of venting, I guess. I just don't feel like a lot of things in my life are meaningful and the only two that make me truly happy are computer games and lifting weights (the second just makes me feel accomplished, knowing that I can bench those 60kg 10 times for the first time in 2 years, today)... everywhere else I look - I just feel bad for a lot of my choices and things I've done... again. Worthlessness kicking in big time and I feel like I just need a drink or 12 to get looser... Sadly I know that's not even remotely good and I can't even bring myself to do it, as I know it's not the answer to my woes. I also might've re-started smoking a cigarette every so often, including literally right now.

It's half triggered by me, and half by the fact that all my friends are with that someone special or have found a "calling" so to say and seem really happy doing things (and some even have kids now ffs! I'm 22 bloody years old!) with/for that, travelling etc, whereas I can barely afford to go anywhere, but I'm even hiding it from my dad as he thinks I've made more than I have.

Again, hope everyone is feeling better than I am. And sorry for the mini-rant.

-V