Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

[Guru888]

No need to feel ashamed mate to the Samaritans. It’s an anonymous phone call, they won’t know who you are, you can speak freely not knowing who they are either.

I personally don’t find it that helpful mate, they are great people for what they do but it’s not really for me

 

[maccavennie]

I personally don’t find it that helpful mate, they are great people for what they do but it’s not really for me

What about a visit to your gp mate? If you could be given any option for help what do you feel might work best for you today? If you feel the Samaritans wouldn't work, is there another avenue that you think you could benefit from? Family friend, GP, online....the main thing is you've posted on here and that's a massive step in the right direction mate

 

[dave n]

I’ve been struggling massively over the last couple of years with addiction, anxiety and now depression and I don’t really know what to do or say on this thread but I do feel very very low the last few days and I’m not good at ringing Samaritans because I feel a bit ashamed

There is an anonymous text messaging service as well mate which is free. I can't remember the name of it but I no Prince William was involved in promoting it and getting men to talk.

 

[davids]

This has been bothering me a bit. The guy's brother has shared news of the death online and people are all "sorry for your loss" etc. as though they're the victims rather than the guy who was so low he saw no way out. We've all let "him" down by not helping him through this. "We" don't deserve sympathy imo.

Think it's just something we say, doesn't have any real meaning other than condolence. As for letting people down, suicide and what drives people to it is a very complex and personal issue. Very little people can do that will make a difference. Some years ago a lad I played football with hung himself because his wife had asked for a divorce. In simple terms what might have saved him would have been her offering a reconciliation,but that was never going to happen.

 

[Guru888]

What about a visit to your gp mate? If you could be given any option for help what do you feel might work best for you today? If you feel the Samaritans wouldn't work, is there another avenue that you think you could benefit from? Family friend, GP, online....the main thing is you've posted on here and that's a massive step in the right direction mate

Thanks for the reply mate, I went to my gp around 3 months ago and got put on sertraline, I’m on the highest dose of 200mg now but haven’t really noticed much change. I’ve struggled with addiction since I was 15 and recently lost my job because of it , I think my family are sick to death of me at this point and I don’t really blame them. I’ve never had a very close family anyway, the only thing stopping me from suicide is that I don’t even have much faith I won’t mess that up aswell, and end up even worse

 

[Bruce Wayne]

I personally don’t find it that helpful mate, they are great people for what they do but it’s not really for me

I sometimes find we're much better at giving other people advice than we are taking it ourselves. If you had a friend in your situation, what would you advise them to do? That might be a good start point.

 

[maccavennie]

Thanks for the reply mate, I went to my gp around 3 months ago and got put on sertraline, I’m on the highest dose of 200mg now but haven’t really noticed much change. I’ve struggled with addiction since I was 15 and recently lost my job because of it , I think my family are sick to death of me at this point and I don’t really blame them. I’ve never had a very close family anyway, the only thing stopping me from suicide is that I don’t even have much faith I won’t mess that up aswell, and end up even worse

Thanks for responding mate.

Firstly regarding gp, get yourself back there mate because it could be that the dose you are on isn't doing the trick. Theres literally been hundreds of posts in this very thread where people have mentioned once they got the correct medication it made a world of difference.

I know it can be really painful but sometimes it can take a few visits to the gp before you get it absolutely spot on. So my honest advice mate on that score is dont give up, go back and be honest with how you are feeling.

Secondly mate, I can be pretty confident that your family would rather you be here than not so try not to add further doubt and anxiety into your own mind by thinking you aren't loved and wouldn't be missed when you would be missed. I bet your loved far far more than you could ever know mate but the only way we get to that point and finding out is by being open and honest.

Someone posted something on here a few days ago mate and it really struck a chord with me. Once we are gone we are gone for good, that's it, no 2nd chances. But while we are here fighting, surviving, theres always another chance to make a difference, to feel that sun on our back, a chance to make memories with friends, loved ones, amazing moments just around every corner.

I wish I had all the answers lined right up mate and I know my advice is basic but its sincere and from one fellow Blue to another, one person to another person please do speak to your gp again mate and your family. Theres no shame whatsoever in needing a bit of help and the biggest shame would be to do nothing.

Keep us posted, keep posting and take that big step forward to getting the help you need by getting in touch with the people who can and will help you

 

[Guru888]

Thanks for responding mate.

Firstly regarding gp, get yourself back there mate because it could be that the dose you are on isn't doing the trick. Theres literally been hundreds of posts in this very thread where people have mentioned once they got the correct medication it made a world of difference.

I know it can be really painful but sometimes it can take a few visits to the gp before you get it absolutely spot on. So my honest advice mate on that score is dont give up, go back and be honest with how you are feeling.

Secondly mate, I can be pretty confident that your family would rather you be here than not so try not to add further doubt and anxiety into your own mind by thinking you aren't loved and wouldn't be missed when you would be missed. I bet your loved far far more than you could ever know mate but the only way we get to that point and finding out is by being open and honest.

Someone posted something on here a few days ago mate and it really struck a chord with me. Once we are gone we are gone for good, that's it, no 2nd chances. But while we are here fighting, surviving, theres always another chance to make a difference, to feel that sun on our back, a chance to make memories with friends, loved ones, amazing moments just around every corner.

I wish I had all the answers lined right up mate and I know my advice is basic but its sincere and from one fellow Blue to another, one person to another person please do speak to your gp again mate and your family. Theres no shame whatsoever in needing a bit of help and the biggest shame would be to do nothing.

Keep us posted, keep posting and take that big step forward to getting the help you need by getting in touch with the people who can and will help you

Wow that was an amazing post and thank you so much for taking the time to send me that and help me mate, I really do appreciate it, thank you, reading that has improved my day already

 

[maccavennie]

Wow that was an amazing post and thank you so much for taking the time to send me that and help me mate, I really do appreciate it, thank you, reading that has improved my day already

More than welcome mate and remember theres loads on here right behind you mate offering support.

When your ready, you go and make the calls you need and today can be positive step number 1.

 

[COYBL25]

I’ve been struggling massively over the last couple of years with addiction, anxiety and now depression and I don’t really know what to do or say on this thread but I do feel very very low the last few days and I’m not good at ringing Samaritans because I feel a bit ashamed

First things first mate, give yourself a massive pat on the back, as step one is recognising that you need to talk about what’s going on and you’ve done that by coming on here.

Many many people find it easier to be open about their problems within the anonymity of a forum such as this - no one knows you, so there’s no feelings of letting people down or shame.

Moving onto shame and letting people down. Up until very recently, fellas were brought up to “ man up “ and hide their feelings. Thankfully that’s changed now, this thread is testimony to that.

I fully understand how hard it is to admit to your nearest and dearest that you aren’t well, but as others have said, do you think they’d want to help you, if they knew how bad things really were - answer, a big fat yes.

Look at things another way. You’re head can break, same as your leg, you just can’t see inside a broken head. So why should a broken head have any stigma attached to it, it’s an illness / injury same as any other ?

As others have said, you need to go back to your GP if your meds aren’t working and either got the dose upped or changed to another type.

The thing with meds for depression and anxiety, is that it’s not an exact science - what works for me, may not work for you, so it can be a bit hit and miss until they get it right.

Also you need to ask your GP about cognitive behavioural therapy ( CBT ) I know you won’t be able to see anyone face to face at the mo, but I know they’re doing stuff on the likes of Zoom and FaceTime etc.

Talking about things with a trained professional can really really help, as they’ll be able to teach you coping mechanisms and how recognise trigger points and how to avoid or deal with them.

Exercise is also wonderful for both depression and anxiety mate, as it releases natural feel good chemicals into your body.

I know you may be feeling like exercise is the last thing you want to do right now, especially with the weather, but try and drag yourself out at least once a day.

I found that completely cutting caffeine out and drinking in extreme moderation helped too mate, as the caffeine really ramped up the anxiety and the hangovers super charged it the following morning - the Irish call it “ the Fear “ which is a brilliant description of the feeling you get the morning after a session.

If you go back through this thread mate, there’s loads of people who came on here who where on their arses and thought things wouldn’t / couldn’t get any better and then slowly with support and help things got better for them.

It’s all about taking little steps mate and you’ve done that by coming on here.

Please keep posting, as there’s so many on here ( as you’ve seen already ) who will support you in anyway they can.

 

[Jacob]

Really echo this. My cousin hung himself yesterday. Please (please, please), if you're struggling at the moment, do talk about it, whether it's on here or to the Samaritans or whomever.

Such a tragic loss. Sincere condolences to you and your family.

 

[Guru888]

First things first mate, give yourself a massive pat on the back, as step one is recognising that you need to talk about what’s going on and you’ve done that by coming on here.

Many many people find it easier to be open about their problems within the anonymity of a forum such as this - no one knows you, so there’s no feelings of letting people down or shame.

Moving onto shame and letting people down. Up until very recently, fellas were brought up to “ man up “ and hide their feelings. Thankfully that’s changed now, this thread is testimony to that.

I fully understand how hard it is to admit to your nearest and dearest that you aren’t well, but as others have said, do you think they’d want to help you, if they knew how bad things really were - answer, a big fat yes.

Look at things another way. You’re head can break, same as your leg, you just can’t see inside a broken head. So why should a broken head have any stigma attached to it, it’s an illness / injury same as any other ?

As others have said, you need to go back to your GP if your meds aren’t working and either got the dose upped or changed to another type.

The thing with meds for depression and anxiety, is that it’s not an exact science - what works for me, may not work for you, so it can be a bit hit and miss until they get it right.

Also you need to ask your GP about cognitive behavioural therapy ( CBT ) I know you won’t be able to see anyone face to face at the mo, but I know they’re doing stuff on the likes of Zoom and FaceTime etc.

Talking about things with a trained professional can really really help, as they’ll be able to teach you coping mechanisms and how recognise trigger points and how to avoid or deal with them.

Exercise is also wonderful for both depression and anxiety mate, as it releases natural feel good chemicals into your body.

I know you may be feeling like exercise is the last thing you want to do right now, especially with the weather, but try and drag yourself out at least once a day.

I found that completely cutting caffeine out and drinking in extreme moderation helped too mate, as the caffeine really ramped up the anxiety and the hangovers super charged it the following morning - the Irish call it “ the Fear “ which is a brilliant description of the feeling you get the morning after a session.

If you go back through this thread mate, there’s loads of people who came on here who where on their arses and thought things wouldn’t / couldn’t get any better and then slowly with support and help things got better for them.

It’s all about taking little steps mate and you’ve done that by coming on here.

Please keep posting, as there’s so many on here ( as you’ve seen already ) who will support you in anyway they can.

Thank you very much for your post mate, I appreciate it massively. I will try too see what other SSRI’s I can try as the sertraline hasn’t worked for me, I have a diazepam addiction which I started taking for panic attacks, I got diagnosed with PTSD and severe anxiety, and was only supposed to take it for a month, but of course got it illegally and got addicted - stupid mistake. I have stopped gambling as badly, mainly because I’m too skint! And I drink less often, once I have one drink I tend to not be able to stop until I pass out. I’ve put on lots of weight over the last few years I was a boxer but turned into an alcoholic. This thread has already cheered me up today, thank you to everybody who replied, I wish you all the best aswell

 

[blue1948]

I’ve been struggling massively over the last couple of years with addiction, anxiety and now depression and I don’t really know what to do or say on this thread but I do feel very very low the last few days and I’m not good at ringing Samaritans because I feel a bit ashamed

I cannot speak for others but if there is anything I can say to help PM me, I will not judge ,I will not ask you to do anything you are uncomfortable with , I just want to listen .
I cannot promise to be online all of the time but if it helps speaking to someone you don't know and will probably never meet then I am ready .
I have never suffered as you are now but I have seen a lot of life and a lot of people who need a helping hand.

 

[Guru888]

I cannot speak for others but if there is anything I can say to help PM me, I will not judge ,I will not ask you to do anything you are uncomfortable with , I just want to listen .
I cannot promise to be online all of the time but if it helps speaking to someone you don't know and will probably never meet then I am ready .
I have never suffered as you are now but I have seen a lot of life and a lot of people who need a helping hand.

Thank you very much mate I will pm you that is very kind of you, if anyone else sees this and wants to talk I will talk to anyone about their problems

 

[Spotty]

First things first mate, give yourself a massive pat on the back, as step one is recognising that you need to talk about what’s going on and you’ve done that by coming on here.

Many many people find it easier to be open about their problems within the anonymity of a forum such as this - no one knows you, so there’s no feelings of letting people down or shame.

Moving onto shame and letting people down. Up until very recently, fellas were brought up to “ man up “ and hide their feelings. Thankfully that’s changed now, this thread is testimony to that.

I fully understand how hard it is to admit to your nearest and dearest that you aren’t well, but as others have said, do you think they’d want to help you, if they knew how bad things really were - answer, a big fat yes.

Look at things another way. You’re head can break, same as your leg, you just can’t see inside a broken head. So why should a broken head have any stigma attached to it, it’s an illness / injury same as any other ?

As others have said, you need to go back to your GP if your meds aren’t working and either got the dose upped or changed to another type.

The thing with meds for depression and anxiety, is that it’s not an exact science - what works for me, may not work for you, so it can be a bit hit and miss until they get it right.

Also you need to ask your GP about cognitive behavioural therapy ( CBT ) I know you won’t be able to see anyone face to face at the mo, but I know they’re doing stuff on the likes of Zoom and FaceTime etc.

Talking about things with a trained professional can really really help, as they’ll be able to teach you coping mechanisms and how recognise trigger points and how to avoid or deal with them.

Exercise is also wonderful for both depression and anxiety mate, as it releases natural feel good chemicals into your body.

I know you may be feeling like exercise is the last thing you want to do right now, especially with the weather, but try and drag yourself out at least once a day.

I found that completely cutting caffeine out and drinking in extreme moderation helped too mate, as the caffeine really ramped up the anxiety and the hangovers super charged it the following morning - the Irish call it “ the Fear “ which is a brilliant description of the feeling you get the morning after a session.

If you go back through this thread mate, there’s loads of people who came on here who where on their arses and thought things wouldn’t / couldn’t get any better and then slowly with support and help things got better for them.

It’s all about taking little steps mate and you’ve done that by coming on here.

Please keep posting, as there’s so many on here ( as you’ve seen already ) who will support you in anyway they can.

Good Post this..