First Impressions of Hill Dickinson Stadium

This article includes references to billionaire, privileged, botoxed women, history, space travel, and Everton. If that’s not your thing, head over to the BBC for news as dry as the soil in that potted plant in your kitchen.

Observations on the first league game (and my first trip) at HD Stadium

Surreal walk out to the stadium from town with my eleven-year-old lad. Haven’t seen a mass human exodus from a city centre like that since season one of The Walking Dead.

The Docklands blend historic grandeur with modern vibrancy. Stunning, really.

The stadium emerges from BM Dock — a thing of beauty.

Bursting with pride inside our new home. Emotional. I just wanted to make eye contact with like-minded souls. Share in the joy. Didn’t happen.

---

Seats are big, comfy. Views are amazing, and I’m at the back of the North West Stand. Bought a £6.95 San Miguel to help with the Dibling money. Yes, it’s expensive, but you don’t have to buy it. Your choice.

And by the way, if you’re drinking the sugar-free Red Bull (£5.25), you just don’t get it.

Boddingtons — time of death 12:56. Ran dry over an hour before kick-off. Thankfully, I don’t drink that stuff.

---

The Pass Through shop worked well. Choice was limited for my 11-year-old lad, but he enjoyed the experience of shoplifting without having to worry about jail time. To be honest, it would have been harsh jail time for a packet of Haribo jellies. I’d recommend the club focus on the kids in those Pass Throughs. Popcorn at a fiver would help with the Dibling money too.

We win two-nil. Not sure how they got the nil, but I’ll take it as compo for my lad’s black Nikes, which are now white Nikes thanks to builders’ dust from the stadium. What are you going to do? After the game, we walked out with the Brighton fans — they seem a nice bunch overall.

---

I made promises at the start of this article, and I’m running out of steam over a beer here at the Crowne Plaza (San Miguel £6.50). Let’s wrap it up.

When Ernest Shackleton led the Imperial Trans-Antarctic Expedition in 1914, trying to complete a land crossing of Antarctica from the South Pole, his ship Endurance (Goodison) became trapped in pack ice (mediocrity). The sailors (you and me, buddy) suffered for quite some time, but it all ended well.

With Hill Dickinson Stadium now in place, we have leapt well past the Apollo 11 moon landing (they said it couldn’t be done). We’re now at Jeff Bezos’ missus and her girlfriends going to space as tourists, in a rocket. Not sure I understand it, but it has something to do with sponsorship, branding, media rights, merchandising, and PR. HD Stadium is a whole new world. Grab your seats and enjoy the ride.

Now go water that potted plant.

UTFT!