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Swansea City 0-2 Everton. 24th March at 15.00.

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"Brutalise their nannas, rape their villages and just get the job f*cking done."

I think we can gather from the above that Moyes needs to let you do the team talks from now on. CHICO IN FFS! Excellent write up.
 
This one felt very lyrical Chico. Lovely job. Will be watching on delay tomorrow, which I don't really like, but at least it's on the tele!
 
"Where’s the cavalier Everton? Brutalise their nannas, rape their villages and just get the job f*cking done"

Is right mate.
You're not Big Dunc in disguise are you ?
 
I smashed a girl in Swansea a few year back, she had a tattoo on her tits of a pair of strawberries with the words "just add cream" written over the top. Classy. She wasn't exactly a featherweight either, I remember taking her back to my digs and humping her on the bathroom sink, until her mighty frame loosened it from the wall.

good times
 
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"Swansea have done better than many expected and sit above us in eighth place in the league. Well done them indeed as it’s the usual trend for the new clubs to start bright and tail off in the second half of the season. They’ve done it while sticking to their footballing principles which is absolute cat nip for the assorted bells in the media who’ve been tripping over themselves to describe a two foot pass from one of their four foot midfielders as being Ajaxesque."

Actual milk coming out of my nose (well tea)
 
Getting this in early

"This was the worst we ever played, if we played our best we could have won" - Everton fans after the final whistle today

We've heard it from every team we played, we make teams look so bad and clueless their fans think it's on them.
 
Getting this in early

"This was the worst we ever played, if we played our best we could have won" - Everton fans after the final whistle today

We've heard it from every team we played, we make teams look so bad and clueless their fans think it's on them.

Off the game lad?
 
Correct me if I'm wrong but Barkley didn't play in the last reserve game did he?

Hopefully he's in the side. Barkley will burst onto the scene today.*












*Well, his knees will.
 
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