The worst idea in the history of bad ideas...and I've got plenty.
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The worst idea in the history of bad ideas...and I've got plenty.
"THE" wimbledon game...we are either 1-0 or 2-0 down and you hear someone "I'll do you Limpar, you f*ckin cnut"
Jimboefc97
Player Valuation: £2.5m
At the derby the other week i brought a red mate who was sat in the seat in front of me and the old man next to him realised he was a red and screamed 'red and white ****e' down his ear for about 5 minutes
Tooley1878
Player Valuation: £750k
To my Missus "Girl, we goina win the league???"
"And by the way how big is Darren Giibbo's thigh? Been on ice for abar 4 months!"
After the Sunderland game, Love our fans !
"And by the way how big is Darren Giibbo's thigh? Been on ice for abar 4 months!"
After the Sunderland game, Love our fans !
Muggins
Player Valuation: £60m
Nice contribution NIK.
carlos_the_jackal
Player Valuation: £950k
Great site lads.
bluejock
Boss coat aficionado
When I was about 15 or 16 I think, was watching an FA Cup game against Coventry from one of the lounges, can't remember which one like.
Anyway, I'm sat next to this rather well dressed chap, 3 piece suit, shiney brogues and the obligatory fur coat clad supermodel-esque wife. David Burrows (remember him?) took a thrown in down below us and the ground had fallen into a Goodison lull.
This walking clothes horse shouts "Burrows! HEY BURROWS!" to which Davie boy glances up to see who's trying to get his attention.
"YER A FAT [Poor language removed] BURROWS"
David's face fell.
Anyway, I'm sat next to this rather well dressed chap, 3 piece suit, shiney brogues and the obligatory fur coat clad supermodel-esque wife. David Burrows (remember him?) took a thrown in down below us and the ground had fallen into a Goodison lull.
This walking clothes horse shouts "Burrows! HEY BURROWS!" to which Davie boy glances up to see who's trying to get his attention.
"YER A FAT [Poor language removed] BURROWS"
David's face fell.
Papa Shango
Player Valuation: £70m
A grim game against Wimbledon sometime in the 90's. Their travelling fans kept singing the hes got no hair but we dont care song about Alan Cork for about 10 minutes solid when someone just leapt to their feet and shouted "Will you two shut up!"
Reidy's Bottle Of Grecian
The Unobstructed View
Daughter had a highlights vid on facebook from the derby, just before the corner and Leons goal someone puts in a request to Mr J Heitinga of the LowLyingLands to "Snap Suarez in half when you get on John" she insists it is me, I did put in such a request tbh. The 3d camera is right near us (church) so quite poss.
Seriously ? Are you typing how you speak purposely ? Or do you see that sentence as correct ?
Is 'abar' the new 'are' ?
Hahaha, that one tickled me.
A collective example of "wit".....
Hibbo's og against Newcastle last match of last season. There was 3 seconds of silence after it (at a push) before some bright spark cheered and then everyone started chanting "he scores when he wants". Brilliant.
tasslehoff
Player Valuation: £10m
Abar is About.
Tooley1878
Player Valuation: £750k
Correct Scouse grammar
Gwladys Nights
Player Valuation: £15m
Syntax, lad.
Essex Blue
Player Valuation: £10m
I’m from Merseyside myself, and over the years I have heard some cracking shouts, too many to remember to be honest. But there is one side of scouse ‘wit’ which pisses me off a little.
For example, I was at the Fulham game the other week, and I’m drinking a pint of lager when some STRANGER comes up to me and asks “Are you drinking murder juice?†I mustered up a fake laugh and told him that yes, I was indeed drinking ‘murder juice’. The guy then literally continued to badger me as to Why? I was drinking murder juice for a good 2 or 3 minutes. Er, hello, maybe it has something to do with it being the only available lager in the ground. And by the way, I’m not immature enough, or sad enough, to give a rats arse as to whether somebody I don’t even know is drinking murder juice or not.
If this wasn’t bad enough, a few minutes later I started to eat my chicken tikka pie, and low and behold some other extremely nosy individual suddenly becomes engrossed by the colour and composition of my pie. He comes over and starts going “F*cking hell lad, why are you eating that mate, it’s yellow FFS. You don’t want to be eating anything that is yellow mateâ€. I just ignored this particular simpleton, but I felt like saying “Er it’s a chicken tikka pie, the filling is supposed to be yellow, and besides, who really gives a fack as to what colour the filling of my pie might be?â€. I think he must have spent some time in jail, because it’s not like chicken tikka pies are unavailable up north, so why was he so shocked by its colour?
I‘ve been to too many games to remember, and this was the first time something like this as happened, so it’s not exactly a common occurrence or anything. But after all is said and done, I found their behaviour to be NOSY in the extreme, and I really think that they should just mind their own facking business, to be honest.
For example, I was at the Fulham game the other week, and I’m drinking a pint of lager when some STRANGER comes up to me and asks “Are you drinking murder juice?†I mustered up a fake laugh and told him that yes, I was indeed drinking ‘murder juice’. The guy then literally continued to badger me as to Why? I was drinking murder juice for a good 2 or 3 minutes. Er, hello, maybe it has something to do with it being the only available lager in the ground. And by the way, I’m not immature enough, or sad enough, to give a rats arse as to whether somebody I don’t even know is drinking murder juice or not.
If this wasn’t bad enough, a few minutes later I started to eat my chicken tikka pie, and low and behold some other extremely nosy individual suddenly becomes engrossed by the colour and composition of my pie. He comes over and starts going “F*cking hell lad, why are you eating that mate, it’s yellow FFS. You don’t want to be eating anything that is yellow mateâ€. I just ignored this particular simpleton, but I felt like saying “Er it’s a chicken tikka pie, the filling is supposed to be yellow, and besides, who really gives a fack as to what colour the filling of my pie might be?â€. I think he must have spent some time in jail, because it’s not like chicken tikka pies are unavailable up north, so why was he so shocked by its colour?
I‘ve been to too many games to remember, and this was the first time something like this as happened, so it’s not exactly a common occurrence or anything. But after all is said and done, I found their behaviour to be NOSY in the extreme, and I really think that they should just mind their own facking business, to be honest.
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