Confirmed Signing James Rodriguez


Or that we’ve terminated the contracts of all of the players we want rid of.

Massive win all round lol
Scene opens.

Point of view of an unknown person walking towards a locker and opening it. They look down and unzip the bag they've been carrying and start emptying the contents of their locker into it. Boots, Sigur Rós CD and a signed photo of Steve Walsh in a heart shaped frame. The person turns and looks down at their phone as they walk away. A message is on the screen showing an email notification from a MLS team.

The person exits the building and starts walking towards a waiting taxi when there is a shout from behind. The camera pans round to show Fabian Delph and Yannick Bolassie. They ask if they can share the taxi as they're both heading towards the airport as well.

Both Fabian and Yannick are on crutches and a good 15 yards behind our unknown protagonist. Both still beat him to the taxi by 5 yards.

Fade to black.
 

NathDogg

Player Valuation: £5m
Scene opens.

Point of view of an unknown person walking towards a locker and opening it. They look down and unzip the bag they've been carrying and start emptying the contents of their locker into it. Boots, Sigur Rós CD and a signed photo of Steve Walsh in a heart shaped frame. The person turns and looks down at their phone as they walk away. A message is on the screen showing an email notification from a MLS team.

The person exits the building and starts walking towards a waiting taxi when there is a shout from behind. The camera pans round to show Fabian Delph and Yannick Bolassie. They ask if they can share the taxi as they're both heading towards the airport as well.

Both Fabian and Yannick are on crutches and a good 15 yards behind our unknown protagonist. Both still beat him to the taxi by 5 yards.

Fade to black.
Incredible - I would pay cash money now to watch that beautiful creation playing on loop at the showcase de lux, in a big recliner seat with a large nachos and tango ice blast combo.

If you are not in the movie business you have misse your vocation mate!
 

TGW89

Player Valuation: £20m
Triple announcement tomorrow then?
If that happens I will actually hold the foreskin together with finger and thumb and allow my unfertilised brood to build up in a fleshy balloon before letting go at the "moment".

It is a technique reserved only for special occasions... I would love to describe what I did after Ferguson's first game as interim, but I'm pretty sure I'd get banned.
 

Zatara

Player Valuation: £70m
James, reveal...

"I am happy to be joining Carlo at Everton football club. Premier league, say hello to my little friend"

Camera pans out to him launching a 35 yard three kick beyond Pickford, Lossl and Virginia who combined, cant keep it out.

Camera pans over to the sideline where Sigurdsson is hiding behind Allan and Doucoure...

...pointing.

 

Charles Plastusz

Player Valuation: £950k
Surely with the huge amount of followers James has on social media and his superstar profile it’s going to make the tenner a week deal we signed with cazoo seem a bit stupid
 

Create an account or login to comment

You must be a member in order to leave a comment

Create account

Create an account on our community. It's easy!

Log in

Already have an account? Log in here.

Welcome to GrandOldTeam

Registration is simple and free. Get involved.

Everton Mishmash
Check It Out!
Legends of Goodison Park
Order Now!
Everton Fan Media
Watch here
Support GOT
With A Subscription
Shop with Amazon
+ Support GrandOldTeam
Top
AdBlock Detected

Adblocking on an Everton fan site is kopite behaviour! ;)

We understand and appreciate why you use Ad-blocking software, but we ask that you kindly consider disabling your Ad-block for GrandOldTeam. We're a fan site ran by fans, for fans. GrandOldTeam costs over £7,000 per year and we rely on our ad revenue to keep the site sustainable. We work hard to ensure our ads aren't instrusive. If you can't or don't wish to disable your Ad-block, please consider upgrading your account for the cost of a pint a month here. Thank You.

I've Disabled AdBlock    No Thanks