JimmyJeffers
Player Valuation: £80m
David Smith? Give me a rich Russian warlord not the local second hand car dealer FFS.... mind you he could give the lads good deals on some Fiestas I guess.
Former Everton Centre Forward Duncan Ferguson steps into management.....
- Thread starter The Penalty Box Dancer
- Start date
Smithy better sort it by tomorrow otherwise that 2.4m will go up by £20.00 and I'll add a £20.00 for every day Smithy drags his feet.
He ain't playing with my emotions like he played with his pinball machines where he earned his money on Blackpool promenade 1986-1992 "Smithy smitten with Pinball Wizard Wonder World" & sons
JimmyJeffers
Player Valuation: £80m
Smithy is a pedo
Exactly Jimmy, who does he think he is? Robin Smith? Jim Smith? Alan Smith? The fella out of the Smiths?
No, he's plain old David Smith, seller of Fiestas with Pinball machines built into the boot winner of a blue Peter badge 1993.
The Penalty Box Dancer
Player Valuation: £35m
David Haythornthwaite has reiterated he will only sell the club to the 'right pair of hands'. The chairman is keen to move away from football and wants the club he has helped shape into a Football League club to be taken to the next level.
Have you seen the morning headlines in the Fylde Gazette!
"Smith smokes Spliff with lover Barry Whiff"
Caught in the players lounge by Eileen.
Yarrgh
Player Valuation: £70m
I just coughed up me dinner reading it. It's just like when the Huck was here. The good ol' days.
Looks like Kirky the sports correspondent has got it in for Smithy after he got sold a slapped up Fiesta. If you remember Kirky got pulled by the police with a big box of dildos in the back and tried to say he'd ordered a box of mangos and not dildos. He found out Smithy had left the big box in the boot on purpose cos Kirky asked for some free windscreen wash to be included in the sale.
Stacey the lollipop stand in for Val took the pic of him up against his Fiesta bonnet and it went viral.
He's been taking crap off all the other journos in the office so has never really forgiven Smithy for it.
Hold onto your seat folks cos Kirky will dig up something Murky over Smithy being Shirky when on holiday in Turkey
The Penalty Box Dancer
Player Valuation: £35m
MK Dons vs AFC Fylde
29th July 2028
Another historic day for AFC Fylde as they begin life in the Football League One for the first ever time. A tough opening fixture away to last season's mid-table finishers MK Dons. Alan O'Neill made his debut along with Vince Bytheway with Steve Stockbridge and Mel Pope on the bench. Fylde got off to the better start, in the opening 25 minutes kept possession and carved out openings but the score remained at 0-0. Vince Bytheway was bringing the ball forward and looking to get crosses in but they were blocked. He found Sargent who struck the bottom of the post and went wide. Bytheway was having an impressive debut and crossed for Henderson who hit the bar with a left footed shot on 40 minutes. It was a fast start in the second half, Alan O'Neill forcing the keeper to palm over the bar with a header, MK Dons forcing Foster into a good save a minute later. Tyrone O'Neill replaced Barry Sargent, Bytheway picked up the ball on 60 minutes on the right side, he crossed early into the box but caught the keeper off his line, he backpeddled to get it but it went in! What a goal for Bytheway! The sun could have played a part in the goal with it bearing down in Milton Keynes this afternoon! MK Dons were putting Fylde under pressure in the last 15 minutes but excellent defensive work won the ball back for Fylde and the loose ball was picked up by Bytheway who hit MK Dons on the counter attack, he played it forward to O'Neill who got the ball across to Henderson who was sprinting down the pitch and he belted it into the top corner to double the lead! Fylde were holding the lead brilliantly but with two minutes to go, Conor Tee rifled in a shot into the top corner at speed which Foster could only watch hit the back of the net. A chance for MK Dons in the dying stages of the game. Five minutes added on, Okoroji took the throw in deep in the MK Dons half to Henderson who played it to McGavin on the edge of the box and he hit a great shot which was tipped over the bar. MK Dons looked dangerous coming forward and there was tension amongst the Fylde players. Ferguson warned his team to calm down and see out the game. Fylde took possession and played it round in the opposition half, the final whistle blew! What a start for The Coasters! It was a nerve racking finish but that win does a lot for their confidence.
DF: I thought we played fantastic. Bytheway is everything I want down the right side and he looks very comfortable and makes the right decisions. We were solid at the back and Alan O'Neill adapted well alongside Nathan Smith. We take the maximum points today and we have to keep working hard and get as many as we can!
PLAYER RATINGS
29th July 2028
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Another historic day for AFC Fylde as they begin life in the Football League One for the first ever time. A tough opening fixture away to last season's mid-table finishers MK Dons. Alan O'Neill made his debut along with Vince Bytheway with Steve Stockbridge and Mel Pope on the bench. Fylde got off to the better start, in the opening 25 minutes kept possession and carved out openings but the score remained at 0-0. Vince Bytheway was bringing the ball forward and looking to get crosses in but they were blocked. He found Sargent who struck the bottom of the post and went wide. Bytheway was having an impressive debut and crossed for Henderson who hit the bar with a left footed shot on 40 minutes. It was a fast start in the second half, Alan O'Neill forcing the keeper to palm over the bar with a header, MK Dons forcing Foster into a good save a minute later. Tyrone O'Neill replaced Barry Sargent, Bytheway picked up the ball on 60 minutes on the right side, he crossed early into the box but caught the keeper off his line, he backpeddled to get it but it went in! What a goal for Bytheway! The sun could have played a part in the goal with it bearing down in Milton Keynes this afternoon! MK Dons were putting Fylde under pressure in the last 15 minutes but excellent defensive work won the ball back for Fylde and the loose ball was picked up by Bytheway who hit MK Dons on the counter attack, he played it forward to O'Neill who got the ball across to Henderson who was sprinting down the pitch and he belted it into the top corner to double the lead! Fylde were holding the lead brilliantly but with two minutes to go, Conor Tee rifled in a shot into the top corner at speed which Foster could only watch hit the back of the net. A chance for MK Dons in the dying stages of the game. Five minutes added on, Okoroji took the throw in deep in the MK Dons half to Henderson who played it to McGavin on the edge of the box and he hit a great shot which was tipped over the bar. MK Dons looked dangerous coming forward and there was tension amongst the Fylde players. Ferguson warned his team to calm down and see out the game. Fylde took possession and played it round in the opposition half, the final whistle blew! What a start for The Coasters! It was a nerve racking finish but that win does a lot for their confidence.
DF: I thought we played fantastic. Bytheway is everything I want down the right side and he looks very comfortable and makes the right decisions. We were solid at the back and Alan O'Neill adapted well alongside Nathan Smith. We take the maximum points today and we have to keep working hard and get as many as we can!
PLAYER RATINGS
JimmyJeffers
Player Valuation: £80m
@maccavennie fire up the Bytheway song!
Yarrgh
Player Valuation: £70m
Dare I suggest he's good enough for the Sinatra treatment.
He did it... bythewayyyyyy
The Penalty Box Dancer
Player Valuation: £35m
AFC Fylde vs Portsmouth
2nd August 2028
The first home game of the season for Fylde and the atmosphere was deafening as they welcomed the players onto the pitch. The home crowd were excited to see how well Bytheway plays after his very impressive debut at the weekend. 20 seconds gone when Bytheway picked up the ball and tried to thread it through to O'Neill but he was beaten to it and cleared to safety. Whitfield took the corner for Portsmouth from the right, Overton headed against the bar, Jerome Smith tapped home the rebound, 1-0 to the visitors! A minute later Fylde hit back with Bytheway supplying the cross into the box and Henderson got his second of the season! Morton lost be ball down the right on 29 minutes but Bytheway won it back, switched the play to Henderson who crossed low for O'Neill who made it 2-1! Fylde come from behind! Portsmouth were a top side and they proved it a few minutes later when Sinclair deceived the defence and played in Joyce who scored to equalise! What a first half it is at Mill Farm. With a minute to go until half-time, Fylde turned up the pressure and were fighting for every ball, Henderson playerd it into the box for O'Neill who got his shot away but it hit the post! The ball ran free and O'Neill slid in to knock it over the line! Five goals in the first half! Fylde ran back out to rapturous cheers from the crowd. Fylde came back out with the same ferocity and Josh Ferguson picked up Nathan Smith's headed clearance and drove forward, he played it wide to Henderson who crossed into the box first time and Bytheway blasted home! What a finish! Fylde playing Portsmouth off the park! It wasn't over and Fylde needed to keep their momentum, Portsmouth's Joe Sbarra hit one back and got lucky with the deflection with his hopeful shot outside the box, Fylde need to see the game out! Henderson done well in winning the ball back and taking it up field to win the free-kick. A minute remaining on the clock and Fylde tighten up in midfield. Joe Sbarra was dangerous from range and Sean Longstaff set him up for a shot that Foster tipped wide. Portsmouth with a last corner kick to try to grab a point. Kyle MacDonald clears away the corner with a header and the whistle blows for full-time! Another win for Fylde and the crowd are ecstatic!
PLAYER RATINGS
2nd August 2028
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The first home game of the season for Fylde and the atmosphere was deafening as they welcomed the players onto the pitch. The home crowd were excited to see how well Bytheway plays after his very impressive debut at the weekend. 20 seconds gone when Bytheway picked up the ball and tried to thread it through to O'Neill but he was beaten to it and cleared to safety. Whitfield took the corner for Portsmouth from the right, Overton headed against the bar, Jerome Smith tapped home the rebound, 1-0 to the visitors! A minute later Fylde hit back with Bytheway supplying the cross into the box and Henderson got his second of the season! Morton lost be ball down the right on 29 minutes but Bytheway won it back, switched the play to Henderson who crossed low for O'Neill who made it 2-1! Fylde come from behind! Portsmouth were a top side and they proved it a few minutes later when Sinclair deceived the defence and played in Joyce who scored to equalise! What a first half it is at Mill Farm. With a minute to go until half-time, Fylde turned up the pressure and were fighting for every ball, Henderson playerd it into the box for O'Neill who got his shot away but it hit the post! The ball ran free and O'Neill slid in to knock it over the line! Five goals in the first half! Fylde ran back out to rapturous cheers from the crowd. Fylde came back out with the same ferocity and Josh Ferguson picked up Nathan Smith's headed clearance and drove forward, he played it wide to Henderson who crossed into the box first time and Bytheway blasted home! What a finish! Fylde playing Portsmouth off the park! It wasn't over and Fylde needed to keep their momentum, Portsmouth's Joe Sbarra hit one back and got lucky with the deflection with his hopeful shot outside the box, Fylde need to see the game out! Henderson done well in winning the ball back and taking it up field to win the free-kick. A minute remaining on the clock and Fylde tighten up in midfield. Joe Sbarra was dangerous from range and Sean Longstaff set him up for a shot that Foster tipped wide. Portsmouth with a last corner kick to try to grab a point. Kyle MacDonald clears away the corner with a header and the whistle blows for full-time! Another win for Fylde and the crowd are ecstatic!
PLAYER RATINGS
RYAN SCOTT SIGNS
Burton Albion vs AFC Fylde
5th August 2028
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Burton Albion took four points from the opening two games and were in the hunt for promotion to The Championship this season. Fylde wanted to extend their 100% record and continue to surprise and perform above expectations for another season running. New on-loan midfielder Ryan Scott made the bench. 12 minutes in and Josh Ferguson intercepts the throw-in with the header, plays it to O'Neill who advances the ball forward to Henderson who slots to make it 1-0! His third of the season! Burton were quick in attack and getting the ball forward, Barron crossed into the box, Foster came forward to claim the ball but Miller headed the ball past him into the back of the net! Nathan Smith sent the ball long for O'Neill to chase but he loses out to a good tackle, Henderson picks it up and crosses from the byline but the ball is cleared out to McGavin who hits the shot first time but sends it wide. Eight minutes into the second half, Okoroji pumps the ball long for O'Neill who gets in from behind, breaks into the area on the left and slots past the keeper! The striker showing fine form with his third of the season! The lead was short when Tiehi crossed from the edge of the box for the header of Nemane but Foster got down to save it but he let it roll free and Nemane pounced to equalise! A big mistake from the goalkeeper! Josh Ferguson left the field with an injury and Ryan Scott came on in a midfield three to make his debut. The game was level at 2-2 with no team looking to take the three points, with seconds remaining on the clock, Bytheway played in Henderson who got into the area, the keeper rushed out and took the ball from his feet, if only Henderson puled the trigger sooner. The referee ended the match and it's a point apiece in a very good game.
DF: It's a good point, we had chances to win the game and I'm happy with how we took it to Burton. Foster made a mistake for the equaliser and he knows it. We have a chance midweek against Birmingham in the League Cup now to progress to the second round and we want to see how far we can go.
PLAYER RATINGS
LEAGUE TABLE
Standing in line
To see the Coasters tonight
And there's a fight on
Heavy blows
Bytheway I tried to say
I'd be there, waiting for
Hendo the lad
Is singing songs to me
Behind the Mill Lane, canteen stove
To see the Coasters tonight
And there's a fight on
Heavy blows
Bytheway I tried to say
I'd be there, waiting for
Hendo the lad
Is singing songs to me
Behind the Mill Lane, canteen stove
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