Former Everton Centre Forward Duncan Ferguson steps into management.....

[cronullasharks]

I went solo for this one Jimmy.... Well I took my twin boys Tango & Cash with me as it was there 15th birthday and I'd taken them to the Burtonwood service station as a treat which is when the Fylde team bus pulled up.

Obviously they were made up as they'd only just got their Fylde Tatooes that morning and air rifles so they just wanted to show Dunc and the lads but you know macca, 2 double cheeseburgers and I'm sound but 3 double cheeseburgers and that colonels secret recipe gets me all pumped up and emotional and the browns touching the cloth like last seasons Bovril Bonanza!

They said I'll be out of here soon if I can make bail and I said "oh yeah of course I can make Gareth Bale come down and sign all your truncheons you massive helmets"

Gareth text me back and said he'll sort it anyway for me and sign all their xxl helmets ( he owed me a favour after I translated a chippy order for him when he first moved to Madrid so we've become decent mates) and that seems to have done the trick.

Just ran into Brett McGavin getting his morning coffee and he looked a bit shaken up, think there's a bit more to this story than you're letting on macca.

 

[Yarrgh]

I don’t read that rag.

I know it's just the Blackpool football mafia clickbait that paper but what else can you do?!?

 

[Jimishorts]

I know it's just the Blackpool football mafia clickbait that paper but what else can you do?!?

The Fylde trumpet is an absolute joke, makes the echo look respectable.

@maccavennie stands up to oppression, confronts the cowards who have gone from 1st to 5th in a couple of weeks and the trumpet is now reporting that not only was there was a “Friendly” kidnapping incident but also some “playful” sexual assault, where will it end.

Sounds like a witch-hunt to me.

Everyone knows what an upstanding member of the community macca is just ask his 4 ex-wives and his 19 kids (only 14 of the kids knew who he was)

I urge all coasters to boycott the trumpet and join the go fund me page justiceformacca and pledge what you can for the inevitable future legal costs.

UTFC

 

[Yarrgh]

The Fylde trumpet is an absolute joke, makes the echo look respectable.

@maccavennie stands up to oppression, confronts the cowards who have gone from 1st to 5th in a couple of weeks and the trumpet is now reporting that not only was there was a “Friendly” kidnapping incident but also some “playful” sexual assault, where will it end.

Sounds like a witch-hunt to me.

Everyone knows what an upstanding member of the community macca is just ask his 4 ex-wives and his 19 kids (only 14 of the kids knew who he was)

I urge all coasters to boycott the trumpet and join the go fund me page justiceformacca and pledge what you can for the inevitable future legal costs.

UTFC

Let's all go out at 8pm on a Thursday when macca would start his weekend drinking sesh and applaud from our doors in solidarity with our brother!

 

[Jimishorts]

applaud from our doors

I think waving a pair of skiddy pants would be more appropriate but I love the idea.

 

[maccavennie]

Just ran into Brett McGavin getting his morning coffee and he looked a bit shaken up, think there's a bit more to this story than you're letting on macca.

Nah, one of Brett's rivals wanted a straightener with him and they sorted out a meeting place. Unfortunately for Brett it was at the Lisbon and the weekend just gone when all the ships were docked. Poor sod went there Friday 9pm and limped out Monday morning.

He'll never be the same again

 

[maccavennie]

The Fylde trumpet is an absolute joke, makes the echo look respectable.

@maccavennie stands up to oppression, confronts the cowards who have gone from 1st to 5th in a couple of weeks and the trumpet is now reporting that not only was there was a “Friendly” kidnapping incident but also some “playful” sexual assault, where will it end.

Sounds like a witch-hunt to me.

Everyone knows what an upstanding member of the community macca is just ask his 4 ex-wives and his 19 kids (only 14 of the kids knew who he was)

I urge all coasters to boycott the trumpet and join the go fund me page justiceformacca and pledge what you can for the inevitable future legal costs.

UTFC

Appreciate it Jimi as always but if you could just sort me out with 8 cans of Stella, 20 Benson and Hedges and a pie dinner I'll be back on top form again.

Have I got 19 kids? Thought it was only 17 so I'm sure I'm missing out on some money there!!!

 

[NeroCeasar]

Appreciate it Jimi as always but if you could just sort me out with 8 cans of Stella, 20 Benson and Hedges and a pie dinner I'll be back on top form again.

Have I got 19 kids? Thought it was only 17 so I'm sure I'm missing out on some money there!!!

You know that two sets of identical twins equals four kids not two, ya?

 

[JimmyJeffers]

Nah, one of Brett's rivals wanted a straightener with him and they sorted out a meeting place. Unfortunately for Brett it was at the Lisbon and the weekend just gone when all the ships were docked. Poor sod went there Friday 9pm and limped out Monday morning.

He'll never be the same again

He fall over in the urinals or something? Floor can get a bit slippery in there

 

[Jimishorts]

Floor can get a bit sticky in there

fixed that for you JJ

 

[maccavennie]

You know that two sets of identical twins equals four kids not two, ya?

I have counted them in NC.

Once I'm out of the slammer I'll sort out a family meeting and count them. Last time I done this my 10 year old (called Van Damme) decided to invite his 2 Mexican mates along to the meeting and I somehow ended up adopting them as well.

 

[JimmyJeffers]

I have counted them in NC.

Once I'm out of the slammer I'll sort out a family meeting and count them. Last time I done this my 10 year old (called Van Damme) decided to invite his 2 Mexican mates along to the meeting and I somehow ended up adopting them as well.

Is Conan keeping well?

 

[maccavennie]

Let's all go out at 8pm on a Thursday when macca would start his weekend drinking sesh and applaud from our doors in solidarity with our brother!

Thanks mate, tbf I thought the clapping was for me anyway as I won a tenner on a scratchcard 8 Thursdays ago.

I thought it was a bit strange the neighbours were still coming out applauding my win after so long.

 

[maccavennie]

Is Conan keeping well?

As soon as he turned 18 he stopped talking to me and moved out the caravan/tent extension.

Changed his name to Ronan and has some kind of posh job stacking shelves in an upmarket town called Marple.

Ungrateful ferret. He'll be back once he's had a taste of the tough life!

 

[Yarrgh]

Thanks mate, tbf I thought the clapping was for me anyway as I won a tenner on a scratchcard 8 Thursdays ago.

I thought it was a bit strange the neighbours were still coming out applauding my win after so long.

Well if you turn up in the Fylde Trumpet on page one holding an oversized cheque whilst wearing your AFC Fylde shirt, then what can you expect. Around ours we often wondered how you'd spend that kind of money.