Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

Nymzee said:
Are there any friends/family members you can lean on to help do the rational thinking for you for a bit? Ask them to check websites etc. with you and keep you focused.
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Well this morning I tried something new, I've always just suffered in silence with things for decades, until it builds so much that it almost explodes out of me and then people who care for me finding it overwhelming to deal with. But this morning I messaged my sister and my ex (mum of my daughter) and said basically, I'm ok, I just want to let someone know I'm not doing so well. Nothing to worry about but I'm struggling.

It went well as I got sensible messages, calls and I met with ex for breakfast. She was supportive etc. it didn't fix my thoughts but at least I didn't repeat my usual suffer alone routine....which I'm an expert at.
 
MrD said:
Well this morning I tried something new, I've always just suffered in silence with things for decades, until it builds so much that it almost explodes out of me and then people who care for me finding it overwhelming to deal with. But this morning I messaged my sister and my ex (mum of my daughter) and said basically, I'm ok, I just want to let someone know I'm not doing so well. Nothing to worry about but I'm struggling.

It went well as I got sensible messages, calls and I met with ex for breakfast. She was supportive etc. it didn't fix my thoughts but at least I didn't repeat my usual suffer alone routine....which I'm an expert at.
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Did you tell them both the situation though? Say hey I really need help finding a new place etc.? Might help kickstart you if it’s just out there and they might then keep on you to get it sorted in time.
 
Nymzee said:
Did you tell them both the situation though? Say he I really need help finding a new place etc.? Might help kickstart you if it’s just out there and they might then keep on you to get it sorted in time.
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I did, they both started looking and really said nice things, I just can't concentrate and look right now because I'm in a right state and will be for a few days. It takes me a while for the "toxins" as I think of them to start to flush away if that makes sense.

I just wanted to get on here and say anything instead of lying here with my heart pounding
 
MrD said:
In terms of legalities and seeking advice I really don't think I have the strength to do it. I think the effort would be better put into moving. I honestly do appreciate the advice though.

Also the cost of renting is obscene. There needs to be a law looking into it
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Hiya mate. You've had some really good advice and support on here so far, and it's good that you've also reached out to people in the "real world" and I'm glad they've been receptive and seen that you're in a bit of a predicament, and that they've been able to offer a bit of human contact - a chat over a brew is sometimes the most simple of things we can do to help each other.

Go easy on yourself and don't feel rushed, you've got an impending deadline that won't go away, but if you can, try to make effective use of that time. And deffo keep using this place as somewhere to vent. You've got this mate.
 
SJB said:
Hiya mate. You've had some really good advice and support on here so far, and it's good that you've also reached out to people in the "real world" and I'm glad they've been receptive and seen that you're in a bit of a predicament, and that they've been able to offer a bit of human contact - a chat over a brew is sometimes the most simple of things we can do to help each other.

Go easy on yourself and don't feel rushed, you've got an impending deadline that won't go away, but if you can, try to make effective use of that time. And deffo keep using this place as somewhere to vent. You've got this mate.
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Thanks mate, once the stress dies down I'll be able to focus better on the task. It has to be done so I can't rely on my usual burying my head in the sand routine.
 
MrD said:
If anyone has any advice or tips on lowering the anxiety, stopping the shakes and keeping a bit of a decent mindset I'm all ears.

I woke up and I can't stop shaking
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I`d recommend going to see your GP and asking for a short course of sedatives. ( Benzos )

Contrary to popular belief, they won`t make you drowsy or feel stoned, but will massively quieten the anxiety down.

They work beautifully and are useful for a " reset ", until the worst is over, but aren`t for long term use, which you`re GP will know, due to the fact that they`re addictive. ( don`t be frightened by this, as they really are only for short term use,a bit like a mental sticking plaster )
 
COYBL25 said:
I`d recommend going to see your GP and asking for a short course of sedatives. ( Benzos )

Contrary to popular belief, they won`t make you drowsy or feel stoned, but will massively quieten the anxiety down.

They work beautifully and are useful for a " reset ", until the worst is over, but aren`t for long term use, which you`re GP will know, due to the fact that they`re addictive. ( don`t be frightened by this, as they really are only for short term use,a bit like a mental sticking plaster )
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Never heard of them. That's definitely good advice. I'll do that.

(I honestly hope I'm not coming across as pathetic but when the high anxiety hits me it seriously does me in. Day to day I get in a bit of a groundhog day and it kids me into relaxing and feeling safe. As soon as something outside that bubble happens my whole world collapses.

It really makes me realise how much I hide from everything and how delicate it's made me. But if it seems daft to anyone I'm sorry, I just don't have many ways to vent, seek a quick friendly chat or just speak to people more grounded than I am)
 
MrD said:
Never heard of them. That's definitely good advice. I'll do that.

(I honestly hope I'm not coming across as pathetic but when the high anxiety hits me it seriously does me in. Day to day I get in a bit of a groundhog day and it kids me into relaxing and feeling safe. As soon as something outside that bubble happens my whole world collapses.

It really makes me realise how much I hide from everything and how delicate it's made me. But if it seems daft to anyone I'm sorry, I just don't have many ways to vent, seek a quick friendly chat or just speak to people more grounded than I am)
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I fully understand how crippling it can be mate and how the slightest thing can tip you over the edge and just turbo charge it, to the point that it`s difficult to function properly.

The sedatives are in the Valium " family " and as I said, they won`t make you stoned, they`ll make you feel " normal ".
 
COYBL25 said:
I fully understand how crippling it can be mate and how the slightest thing can tip you over the edge and just turbo charge it, to the point that it`s difficult to function properly.

The sedatives are in the Valium " family " and as I said, they won`t make you stoned, they`ll make you feel " normal ".
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Like a big hug they feel like
I love the feeling ( hence why so easy to get addicted to)
 
This may sound ridiculous so apologies in advance but, at 48 I don't really know the best way to start to make changes.

I've always let my mood and avoidance dictate my days, so obviously that means my mood stays very low and I avoid everything.

Sometimes the idea of going for a walk makes me feel sick, eating more fruit and veg etc.

I just eat frozen convenience foods, biscuits etc as I find it less of a chore to prepare etc.

I'm starting to feel like it's now or never to make a few changes but that mood/hiding/cowardly side is the only thing I've ever known and it's hold over me seems to be total.

I'm very stressed and I just want to.....you know. (Trying not to say it)
 

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