Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

[SiEdmo]

You`re spot on about taking responsibility there mate.

What I found with my mate, was that she start to feel better / normal ( which was down to the meds ), she`d stop taking them without telling anyone and the BOOM it`d all blew up again.

It was only after she`d been hospitalised that she realised how selfish she had been and the grief she was causing.

I do feel sorry for these people like, its the horrible spiral of mental health

I do feel sorry for my mum, but at the end of the day, how do you help someone who wont help themself

 

[hallamblue]

So the fun continues. Been to the funeral directors, back to the bereavement bit of the hospital and the registrar's to register the death. Me, my sister and my aunty ( mum's sister) have been organising everything. To be fair there have been some happy memories exchanged as well. However, we are all on our way home and have had to leave dad in the house by himself. I said goodbye to him, then realised I'd forgotten something, went back in and he was sobbing his heart out. It's going to be really tough, but having been strong for mum through 3 months of hell, I now need to be strong for dad. I hate getting older.

 

[allezlesbleus]

mine died just over a week ago, wish I could say something to help you mate, but I haven't a clue what to do except try and carry on as normal as possible , and help those around you as best you can.
used to see mine every day and its a big hole to fill, but I know she would want me to stay strong for the family, and you can take comfort in the fact that she like mine died surrounded by people she loved and as peaceful as possible.
take care mate.

Condolences mate.

 

[allezlesbleus]

Mum has died. She passed away at 5pm. She chose to go which I'm glad about, as the situation was hopeless and the hospital were only prolonging the inevitable. Dad managed to get there in time, and was holding her hand when she went. I'm travelling over now to be with him. It's a surreal feeling, knowing that I'll never speak to her again.

Condolences mate.

 

[chrismpw]

It's a huge thing at the moment - mental health and well being at work. You need to look at things like does your company have a counselling service that the employees can access should they need to. If not is there anybody who can signpost them to organisations that could help? Do you have a stress policy? When a person who is suffering from stress returns to work does the company do a stress risk assessment to find out if there is anything they can do to help the employee? What's the policy on holidays and work/life balance- are people actively encouraged to take their holidays or is working long unpaid extra hours part of the culture and expected. How does the company deal with bullying - is it ignored or actively dealt with.(slightly off topic if you are ever bullied and mediation is offered don't do it. It isn't the right forum to deal with it) Do employees know who to speak to if they are being bullied. Is it OK to talk about feeling stressed? We have just trained some mental health first aiders who are supposed to be able to recognise signs of stress in their colleagues and if somebody is having a mental health crisis (don't know if that's the right word) the mental health first aiders are supposed to be able to assist them to stay calm until the appropriate medics arrive.

I'm currently helping a person who has been diagnosed with work place stress. She went to Occupational health who suggested that she be given paid time off to attend counselling appointments, we have regular meetings with her line manager to discuss how she feels and if there is anything else that can be put in place. She is allowed micro breaks if she starts to feel stressed where she can just go somewhere quiet and use some of the coping strategies she has been given to help her. Unfortunately her coping strategy is sitting in the disabled loo and crying. Not great.

Hope this helps.

This is superb insight, but I worry.

It is a huge thing at the moment, but shouldn't these companies be ploughing their resources into fixing the causes of stress, rather than fixing the symptoms?

 

[chrismpw]

Mum has died. She passed away at 5pm. She chose to go which I'm glad about, as the situation was hopeless and the hospital were only prolonging the inevitable. Dad managed to get there in time, and was holding her hand when she went. I'm travelling over now to be with him. It's a surreal feeling, knowing that I'll never speak to her again.

Feel for you mate. I've lost one parent, over 20 years ago, it was horrible then and it's never easy when you're reminded of it. In time though, the intensity of the loss is replaced with warm and fond memories.

 

[edge]

Mum has died. She passed away at 5pm. She chose to go which I'm glad about, as the situation was hopeless and the hospital were only prolonging the inevitable. Dad managed to get there in time, and was holding her hand when she went. I'm travelling over now to be with him. It's a surreal feeling, knowing that I'll never speak to her again.

.I know it's nothing in the grand scale things but I lit that candle for you today mate at my mams funeral,
Daft but mum was a blue season ticket holder for years and I couldn't break a promise to a blue , not into to religion mate but was thinking of you today.
Take care.

 

[CrustySack]

@edge @hallamblue

I'm sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to both of you. I lost my mum 4 years ago. It was horrendous as she suffered in her final years. We idolized each other.

I'm trying to think of some comfort I can give you. Be kind to yourselves. Your emotions and beliefs have taken a hammer blow. I went through anger, guilt, and then just sadness. Time helps you to accept the situation.

Memories and photographs are so important to the healing process. Remember the good times. Try not to think about the end, or how it came to be, because that regurgitates the pain.

I wish I could say more.

 

[Turfman]

Quick question folks.

I have recently had to complete a Health and safety questionnaire for work that was issued by a client. Generally, this is a fairly standard document that assesses our H&S management system, but today I had a new question.

"How will you improve the wellbeing of your staff and operatives working in the Partnership? Provide details of specific wellbeing initiatives or processes currently implemented by your organisation and any planned improvements for the next 24 months."

Having a quick look online, I assume this is referring to things such as stress, anxiety and mental health, as we already cover, in great detail the physical side of health and safety.

Has anyone had a work related issue, and how did the company respond? Is anyone involved in such an initiative? How did it help?

I know there are lots of forums out there specifically for this type of question, but I'd like some insight from fellow blues if possible.

Thanks in advance.

Good to hear some companies have the well being of their employees in mind. it was only a couple of years ago I tried to disclose to my HR rep that I was "having struggles", and I would like to think she meant well, but her advice to me was "you should probably keep that to yourself"...
I was kinda dumbfounded, and decided to explore other routes to finding help. So when I hear positive things being developed it does sound like progress is being made.

 

[Foot Long Hot Dog]

Mum has died. She passed away at 5pm. She chose to go which I'm glad about, as the situation was hopeless and the hospital were only prolonging the inevitable. Dad managed to get there in time, and was holding her hand when she went. I'm travelling over now to be with him. It's a surreal feeling, knowing that I'll never speak to her again.

So sorry to hear your news mate, at least she is now at peace though. Stay strong but make sure you grieve, when I lost my Mum I didn’t allow myself to grieve properly and as a result it caused me an issue for many years when I was young.

 

[Foot Long Hot Dog]

Quick update on me btw, I’m much stronger, the treatments are all going well and I feel as well as I’ve felt since before my diagnosis. I’m still in a very precarious position but there’s hope and that’s what I cling on to. I’m going to the game again today, which says it all really. Thanks to all who’ve continued to enquiry about me btw.

 

[anjelikaferrett]

This is superb insight, but I worry.

It is a huge thing at the moment, but shouldn't these companies be ploughing their resources into fixing the causes of stress, rather than fixing the symptoms?

Absolutely. The stress can be caused by domestic circumstances but it is very hard to separate the two. Home life can and does impact on work life. Employers should be recognising this and being supportive rather than having a one size fits all, usually punitive, sickness absence policy.

 

[FC sexy xxx]

Quick update on me btw, I’m much stronger, the treatments are all going well and I feel as well as I’ve felt since before my diagnosis. I’m still in a very precarious position but there’s hope and that’s what I cling on to. I’m going to the game again today, which says it all really. Thanks to all who’ve continued to enquiry about me btw.

great stuff mate . Keep fighting and hopefully the blues will make going the match worthwhile today

 

[Bungle]

Quick update on me btw, I’m much stronger, the treatments are all going well and I feel as well as I’ve felt since before my diagnosis. I’m still in a very precarious position but there’s hope and that’s what I cling on to. I’m going to the game again today, which says it all really. Thanks to all who’ve continued to enquiry about me btw.

Glad to hear you're making good progress mate, you realise Everton are going to ruin your day though yes?

 

[Jacob]

Quick update on me btw, I’m much stronger, the treatments are all going well and I feel as well as I’ve felt since before my diagnosis. I’m still in a very precarious position but there’s hope and that’s what I cling on to. I’m going to the game again today, which says it all really. Thanks to all who’ve continued to enquiry about me btw.

Thats really great that you feel better than in a long time. Your inner strength is pulling you through this. Enjoy your day today...and heres to a good performance and...or just...the three points.