hi fellow evertonians been on this site a while now and seen this thread but bypassed it cs it didnt concern me ... untill NOW
so here goes.. on friday my 24 yr old daughter tried to take her life i was out and was contacted by my 16 year old daughter who answerd the door too police who had had a call of my older daughters mate that my daughter was in trouble sure enough the police came in and found her in a drunken overdosed state with superficial self harm wounds
this is a big shock for my wife and me and all the family.... she was taken too hospital and is fine atm it turns out my daughter has and has had a eating disorder for yrs and none of us knew about she covered this with going gym and building a muscular body but has slipped a disc so cant go for a while i did notice she was losing weight but didnt think much about it what brought it to this situation was her friend saying she cant deal with her all the time and needed to tell us am really bad at this kind of stuff and trying to understand whats going on... now its all in the open it seems she been paying for her own treatment as well as going to her gp on the sly.. now she has been allowed home and the hospital has put some help in place for her i have managed too get her some time of work etc now she saying to my wife she sorry etc but wont eat because i took her laxatives of her. i know this is going too be a long process but can anyone advise me do i give her laxitives back ? am sorry if this sounds like mumbo jumbo also sorry if my post doesnt make sense but i feel spaced out myself with worry would be grateful for any feed back... thnx in advance coyb
Macker you must be worried, understandably. She may have wanted to kill herself but from what you've said bud, her actions to me indicate a cry for help. She's hurting and the overdose is a way of telling people " I need help ". Not hard for any daughter to purposefully want to distress parents. One " positive " is at least you now know she is struggling and along with other family members can be very supportive for her. She'll be relieved deep down that dad knows she needs help as she knows your love for her is unconditional. I would like to think that at some point, someone from the mental health team will sit down with her, chat, and assess her current needs.
Self harming is a way for your daughter to inappropriately deal with the stress she is experiencing. It's not a suicide attempt in any way, but for some reason she feels the self harm helps her cope, and yes, self harm can / does help people " feel better ". The laxatives she can get any time macker. As you've asked directly whether or not to give them back to her, might I suggest you ask her supportively why she wants them. Weight loss is the very obvious reasons, but you could say that as you care and love her, your not going to give her them back. As I said Macker, if she wants laxatives she'll get them, but it is a worry that she feels the need to use them . I don't know how old she is or whether she has an issue with her weight, but her self esteem is at at rock bottom, and unfortunately, if she's a teen, body image is massive, especially as a teen. I've just spent 7 years working in a CAHMS Unit and your daughter's behaviours are often the " norm " for many teen girls.
Are you worried ?, Of course you are but your daughter's actions are a cry for help. She's stressed about something and it's important to find out what's going on for her. She's not a " freak " or " abnormal " as she may be thinking. She's a young lady, struggling with a few issues and is dealing with them in a harmfull way. She needs to know Macker she is is loved, cherished and importantly normal. Re assure her that the problems she's experiencing she can get help with and she can recover and move on with her life. It's a good thing Macker you are aware of her issues and you can support her accordingly. I will close by informing you there is no time scale on getting better. Let her recovery take shape, slowly if needs be and small steps. She WILL get there with support.
I've got a few shifts coming up but if you want to DM me please do, I will help in any way I can. Please don't worry too much.Your daughter will get the support and help she needs and help her realise, she DOES have the skills that will help her cope better. Take care Macker.
