Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues
- Thread starter Groucho
- Start date
MrD
Player Valuation: £15m
I have loads of time. eating healthier is something i definitely need to do
summerisle
The rain, it raineth every day
I know this sounds silly, but following on about cooking, try going to the supermarket and looking for some reduced items. You find some real bargains and it makes you feel very smug that you've bought something at half price or more compared to the hoi polloi.
It also has the added benefit of getting food that you wouldn't usually buy, which means that you have to investigate what meals you can cook with it. You'd be suprised by the results - amaze your family and friends! Decent reductions usually start around 5/6 pm. My freezer is bursting with bargains.
It's not ridiculous, and there's no apologies required. When I went through a bit of therapy my counsellor would regularly ask me 'how I'd eat an elephant', they were driving at a point where I'd break an issue down and deal with it a bit at a time. (One fork full at a time).
This served to highlight patience. It had taken a long time for me to get into the mither I had, and expecting a hey-presto instant change was foolish on my part. I had to change the smaller easier bits of behaviours that I could first and then move onto some of the deeper more difficult stuff. Investing this time and making slow improvements can and does add up.
When the idea of something, like in the case you mention 'going for a walk' knocks you sick, that is the most important time to do it anyway. When you let your feeling of dread dictate that you don't bother, it feeds another feeling which is guilt. Now you're dealing with more negativity.
Winters can be difficult, we don't see enough natural light, SADS is a real thing (seasonal affective disorder syndrome) and as we age we become less efficient at producing vitamin D. A vitamin D supplement might be helpful. It's part of my top up stuff alongside cod liver oil.
We all behave different under stress, it might be worth getting a message to your doctor to see if you can get on the waiting list for some counselling. Talking through stress, causes and triggers, and learning some coping methods is definitely something to reach out for.
Believe me, if you're hiding in booze, it aint no good and only makes things worse.
Clean the bathroom, gut the kitchen, weed the drive, put a wash through the washer. Do something that is a small victory for today where something positive has been achieved. We can't climb Everest everyday, but we can climb out of bed and do something for a bit of benefit.
I can relate to a lot of what you've said as Ive suffered a fair bit myself most of my life.
One thing that keeps me going is exercise- running, or even just a walk. When I cant do it for a period due to various reasons, my mood tends to deteriorate quite badly. The last thing I feel like doing is exercising in those moments. However, I know from experience if I can just manage to force myself to get out and do it then my mood will improve. Its a fact that I have to remind myself of quite often!
One thing that keeps me going is exercise- running, or even just a walk. When I cant do it for a period due to various reasons, my mood tends to deteriorate quite badly. The last thing I feel like doing is exercising in those moments. However, I know from experience if I can just manage to force myself to get out and do it then my mood will improve. Its a fact that I have to remind myself of quite often!
gonetomorrow
Player Valuation: £80m
Walking is good. I walk with the bluetooth headphones on and listen to all sorts of stuff as I go along. I inevitably feel better as a result. You hardly notice you're exercising.
BluePaul86
Player Valuation: £10m
Hi mate, I can relate to alot of this. I'm just about to turn 40, I still live at home, don't drive and have recently ended a relationship with someone who genuinely loved me because i didn't feel adult enough to be ready to 'do life' with someone. It cuts me up that I've probably ruined my one chance at happiness and hurt a lovely person too.
I suffer with 'avoidance issues' basically I will put an obstacle in front of anything that could potentially cause a big change in my life e.g looking at buying my own place, because I can't deal with the stress, anxiety it will bring and putting a barrier in front of everything is the easier option.
At a stage of my life now where I have to make changes or it'll be too late and I've noticed in the past week or so I've been really restless at night and waking up feeling groggy and full of dread about the future.
Can only echo what others have said that long walks and exercise are a big calming tools for me.
It is learning how to break down things into, at times literally, small steps.
It is very very easy to get overwhelmed with change and see where you think you need to be, and through a negative lens, where you are.
Usually neither is correct.
If you ask distance runners how do you run a marathon most will answer one step at a time.
It isn't being smug it's saying you break it down into manageable chunks and they may be the smallest steps when things are really tough.
Cooking. Going for a walk. Both excellent suggestions. But whatever you choose start small.Very small if required and see where it takes you. Don't be disillusioned if the plan needs to change. That really is the point of having a plan.
Also remember WE all have good and bad days.
As always, and to everyone, good look in what you do.
Bryan+
Player Valuation: £40m
Feel terrible posting after what I have read above but here we go.
Again, i am unbelievably fortunate i get private healthcare and i can feel my own anger at the privilege of this all around me, people, services, diagnoses - all whilst the NHS is dying on its arse. The irony is two of them i see are NHS doctors they also do foreigners for Bupa & Nuffield Health.
Been seeing a psychologist and a few other very well equipped people who deal with it all and i think i had already posted it, but the psychologist has described me and diagnosed me with complex ptsd which i think i mentioned previously. i dunno how i feel about it all, but sticking a label on it feels a bit more like closure to me, but they say its just the beginning, i have started something called EMDR and i pray it works. Not sure when i return to work but its not anytime soon.
Again, i am unbelievably fortunate i get private healthcare and i can feel my own anger at the privilege of this all around me, people, services, diagnoses - all whilst the NHS is dying on its arse. The irony is two of them i see are NHS doctors they also do foreigners for Bupa & Nuffield Health.
MrD
Player Valuation: £15m
Sorry to hear all that. I've just downloaded some books on Internal family systems and EMDR myself. I really hope things get better for you mate.
efcjames
Player Valuation: £35m
Hello everyone, hope you’re doing well.
I’ve had severe brain fog and energy related issues for many years now, I find it very hard to think clearly when doing anything & recently I’ve been extremely tired, I can fall asleep for hours at the weekend, wake up and just go sleep again.
I had a blood test last year to try and sort the brain fog, but everything came back OK. I really want to try find what the problem is, so would anyone know what I should try to do going forward, what specific type of appointments to make with GP etc?
Many thanks all
COYB
I’ve had severe brain fog and energy related issues for many years now, I find it very hard to think clearly when doing anything & recently I’ve been extremely tired, I can fall asleep for hours at the weekend, wake up and just go sleep again.
I had a blood test last year to try and sort the brain fog, but everything came back OK. I really want to try find what the problem is, so would anyone know what I should try to do going forward, what specific type of appointments to make with GP etc?
Many thanks all
COYB
You`ve almost word for word described the condition and old mate of mine had.
She was batted from Dr to Dr, until eventually she was diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, more commonly known as M.E.
She was fortunate in that she worked for the NHS, so had a lot of protection with regards to being off sick etc.
Have a look at Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and see what you think ?
Her biggest problem, was that a lot of Dr`s thought it was all in her head or that she was homesick, as she`d recently moved from Blackburn to Hertfordshire and no one took her seriously ( some Dr`s don`t believe it`s a real thing ! )
efcjames
Player Valuation: £35m
The symptoms do sound very similar to mine, will have a read into that more
