Everton Football Club would like to make a statement regarding two members of the playing staff.
As you know we have been involved in protracted contract talks with both Barkley and Lukaku, these have been challenging but we are pleased to announce that they're both a bunch of beeps. Never have we had the pleasure of dealing with such petulant and ungrateful beeps, we offered double the amount they are being paid at the moment and yet no, that's not beeping good enough for the beeping beephouse beeps.
We have transfer listed the beeps and look forward with great glee to seeing their beeping careers go down the beeping toilet.
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