bluejock
Boss coat aficionado
Manager - Woy Hodgson
Squad
Goalkeepers - Joe Hart (Manchester City FC), Robert Green (West Ham United FC), Jack Butland (Birmingham City FC)
Defenders - Leighton Baines (Everton FC), Gary Cahill (Chelsea FC), Ashley Cole (Chelsea FC), Glen Johnson (Liverpool FC), Phil Jones (Manchester United FC), Joleon Lescott (Manchester City FC), John Terry (Chelsea FC) Phil Jagielka (Everton FC)
Midfielders - Stewart Downing (Liverpool FC), Steven Gerrard (Liverpool FC), Jordan Henderson, James Milner (Manchester City FC), Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain (Arsenal FC), Scott Parker (Tottenham Hotspur FC), Theo Walcott (Arsenal FC), Ashley Young (Manchester United FC)
Forwards - Andy Carroll (Liverpool FC), Jermain Defoe (Tottenham Hotspur FC), Wayne Rooney (Manchester United FC), Daniel Welbeck (Manchester United FC)
IN-GER-LUND IN-GER-LUND IN-GER-LUND. Here it is ladies and gents, the one you've all be waiting for, grab yourself some plastic patio furniture and get ready for the riot police. The European champions in waiting. Actually, to be fair, there isn't the usual national (ridiculous) optimism regarding England's chances in a major football finals. Everyone seems a bit meh about it all, due in no small part to the number of utterly gash players selected in place of some decent, talented players who have missed out, but more on that in a moment.
The qualifying campaign was played unter the tutelage of that weird looking old bloke from the Pixar movie Up. England topped their group with 5 wins and 3 draws from their 8 games, dropping points at home to Switzerland and Montenegro didn't do much to inspire the confidence of a nation. One high point though was the emergence of Ashley Young (the diving, cheating git) as a top class winger and a real goal threat from midfield. The major talking point came after the football had finished with "Captain Fantastic" John Terry being charged with racially abusing Anton Ferdinand, being stripped of the armband by the FA and Fabio taking a massive strop at this and buggering off back to his villa in the Tuscan hills.
The squad features two blues, Leighton Baines and, after the withdrawal of the perennially average Gareth Barry, Phil Jagielka. Neither will start, in fact Baines will be lucky to see any action at all as Ashley Cole, despite being a mutant, is actually quite a decent left back. Joe Hart, for me the best keeper in the world right now, will start between the sticks, and if he gets injured, they might as well pack up and go home as Robert Green is mince. After pulling out of the National Front summer camping trip to Bodmin, John Terry will line up beside Chelsea team mate Gary Cahill at centre half. Young and possibly Walcott will provide the width with Parker partnering that small foreheaded sh*itehawk DJ thumper in centre mid although it would be magnificent for us outsiders if the terminal Downing and badly Adam Henderson get a game. Wayne Rooney misses out the first two games through suspension so expect long balls galore to Andy "£35 million? Really?" Carroll until Wayne's return.
Jock's player to watch is the aforementioned Ashley Young. Although we all know he's a cheating little so and so, he offers England's biggest threat in Rooney's absence with an eye for goal and plenty of direct running, he'll be crucial in putting England in a position to qualify for the latter stages.
Prediction
Although plenty are talking up Ukraine and Sweden, possibly to get the excuses in early, just in case, England should have no bother getting out of this group. Can they beat France to top the group? They can, but they won't and this will set up a quarter final against Spain who will probably prove just too strong. It might even be penalties, we all know how you Englanders enjoy a 12 yard shootout. Quarter finals, and then hopefully for the fans' sake, Uncle Woy will begin to clear out the dead wood and start afresh as there's plenty of young talent out there.
"IN-GER-LUND......."
