Joke thread

[Pat's Van]

Doctor ....."sorry Mr Jenkins, you've only got 3 minutes left to live"


Mr Jenkins .."oh God no, isn't there anything you can do for me ?"


Doctor ........"boiled egg ?"

 

[Dell Boy]

Bill Roach, Jim Davidson, Rolf Harris, Stuart Hall and Freddie starr..you've got to admit, the prison panto is looking good this year !

 

[chrissyjack]

I once went with a one-armed prostitute. Even with just the one hand, she still managed to give me the clap

 

[GoatJR]

knock knock
whos there
alec
alec who
i alec to pick my nose


Knock Knock!
Who’s there?
Doris!
Doris who?
Doris locked that’s why I am knocking!


Knock Knock!
Who’s there?
Cheese!
Cheese who?
Cheese a cute girl!

 

[GoatJR]

Teacher: Email

Kid: My Email ?

Teacher: Yes Your Email

Kid: Umm

Teacher: Well -___-

Kid: ._.

Kid : pussydestroyer69@yahoo.com

 

[Allezfan]

Two nuns are in the bath.

One goes "where's the soap?"

The other goes "Yeah, it does, doesn't it. Still it's the best we're going to get."

 

[Allezfan]

Teacher: Email

Kid: My Email ?

Teacher: Yes Your Email

Kid: Umm

Teacher: Well -___-

Kid: ._.

Kid : pussydestroyer69@yahoo.com

Hahahahahahaha!

Well in, kid.

 

[GoatJR]

Hahahahahahaha!

Well in, kid.

got it from twitter

here is the person

@PhineasAndFerrb

 

[GoatJR]

Me: Can I go to the bathroom?, Teacher: What for? Me: TO OPEN THE CHAMBER OF SECRETS, What do you *u**ing think for.

 

[GoatJR]

School
Schoo
Scho
Sch
Sc
S
Su
Sum
Summ ☺
Summe
Summer

Me: Exercise
Me: Exercis
Me: Exerci
Me: Exerc
Me: Exer
Me: Exe
Me: Ex
Me: Extra fries