Joey Barton


I'm glad that Joey Barton didn't get jail time; he'd probably wear it like some sort of badge of honour. Maybe a heavy fine and an 18-month total Social Media ban would have been a good thing to add to his suspended sentence and community service.
 


Made up for him that he’s finally able, with his podcast, to finally be a full time bellend.

It’s clearly something he’s wanted to do his whole life, but was only able to do it part-time due to his pesky career getting in the way.

He had the raw talent to have been a very good internationally quality footballer. But he sacrificed some of that to just be a middling league player in order to follow his passion of bellendery by assaulting his team mates and random people on the street.

Then when he went into management, it was clear he hated it and would much rather be a bellend, so moonlighted with bullying his own players and assaulting them in the tunnel. In fact he dedicated so much time to his art that he forgot to actually manage the clubs he was in charge of and they sacked him.

He then went into social media punditry, but those pesky women footballers and TV presenters didn’t understand the art form that is ‘being an utter bellend’ and thus ended that career as well.

It could have all come crashing down there, but it’s so heartening to see him flourishing on his podcast as a full time bellend. Shouting barely veiled racist insults at Alexander Isak and berating men for showing emotion on TV. He really is in his element.

Inspiring.
 

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