evertoniano
Player Valuation: £1.5m
Brilliant review m8 had a right chuckle!
- Status
That Count of Monte Bisto paragraph is what will finally win you the Nobel Prize in Literature @chicoazul.
Can't help but feel you've flung some of those descriptions at @MikelsGoat in the past though.
Can't help but feel you've flung some of those descriptions at @MikelsGoat in the past though.
Some excellent descripts of Large Samuel there @chicoazul!
Mrtallywacker
GOT spiritual advisor
Terrible review, thoroughly enjoyed it.
Romans 5:3
More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance
God bless
Romans 5:3
More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance
God bless
Remember one with bee stings. Beautiful stuff. Always. I thank you.
Charles Hawtrey
Player Valuation: £40m
a master class! of course BFS and the Baggies are a match made in heaven for such wordsmithery. The BFS paragraph is a wonder!
Always the first thing to look for in a match build up again - thank you for your time and effort putting these together.
Always the first thing to look for in a match build up again - thank you for your time and effort putting these together.
The binman chronicles
Player Valuation: £80m
Didn't spend long enough insulting gravy chops for me. Thumbs down. 
DownOnTheUpside
Player Valuation: £30m
Howled laughing at that Big Sam paragraph
Really though it’s too easy to sneer at the Count of Monte Bisto when his record with multiple clubs is superior to many with funkier reputations that have failed dismally in the Premier League. Sure his football might not be to taste but if it is so basic then why have so many had trouble overcoming it? Clubs know exactly what they’re getting and are quite happy to trade their XG and training ground plumbing in return for it, placing the obnoxious tactical toad in the hot seat chest pumping and promising you salvation, while lashing out a vile tongue to lick his own eyeball. A man whose most sordid fantasy is a deflected header. A man who thinks horses for courses is a credible gourmet option. A man who chews his own farts. A man who exhales CFCs. A man whose shadow alone can kill a season’s crops. A man who’s served toast by the lorry. A man who grazes on desperation. A man who wears a hammock as a mask. Where number tens go to die. NASA couldn’t land a rover on his back. The TK Maxx oops rail suit wearing slug. If you throw a coin down his belly button your team concede a corner. Stencil that jaw with KIRKBY SKIPS as he chomps hard and true on eternal dumpling. I bet his armpits break Geigers. The foul touchline manatee. I miss him and his post match quotes so so much.
Absolutes tears reading that
A man who chews his own farts.
Hahahahahahahha.
I love reading these, some classics in there today, my top two. The Count of Monte Bisto and horses for courses as a credible gourmet option. Don’t stop Chico.
Chico back to his best.
So many good lines in this one. Particularly enjoyed the bit about Grande Granules licking his own eyeballs.
So many good lines in this one. Particularly enjoyed the bit about Grande Granules licking his own eyeballs.
I particularly enjoyed that there was that much incredible description of Fat Sam without ever needing to show a picture of him and ruin it.
What I was most impressed with though was that you found a picture of Andy Gray face to face with a man who appeared to be Tom DeLonge from Blink 182 dressed up in his wig from the First Date video.
What I was most impressed with though was that you found a picture of Andy Gray face to face with a man who appeared to be Tom DeLonge from Blink 182 dressed up in his wig from the First Date video.
wainy
Player Valuation: £35m
Some incredible insults on big Sam, I salute you @chicoazul
- Status
