'Breaking News that nobody is interested in' ...

[rascal]

I can't decide where I actually want to go on holiday in December.

Life's tough.

 

[rascal]

Me & the wife are having a date night tonight !!

Will there be a video camera to film the in bed action? Just asking for a friend.

 

[summerisle]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/snooker/41732548

Charismatic snooker superstar Stuart Bingham banned for 6 months for betting on matches.

 

[summerisle]

The Third Battle of Ypres has just started.

 

[Lickle eric]

I had a macdonalds strawberry milkshake this afternoon ,i could taste banana in it.

 

[Groucho]

Norman from Fireman Sam is a massive tit.

And so is Daddy Pig from Peppa Pig.

 

[chrissyjack]

I've just had some plum crumble the lads girlfriend made . It was nice

 

[tonyhorne]

I refused to apply myself in work today in the hope of being sent home.

Nobody seemed to notice any difference...

 

[WA Toffee]

Put the air conditioner on at home today for the first time this season

 

[Eggs]

...been to a funeral today, mate asked me to be a pall bearer at his dads funeral. Not many honours greater than that, great day in great company.

 

[Ducans elbow]

Handed in my retirement papers today

 

[Eggs]

Handed in my retirement papers today

..well done, Fella.

 

[kev]

Handed in my retirement papers today

Welcome to life. You will soon wonder how you ever found the time to go to work

 

[summerisle]

You've got 30 mins.

 

[Eggs]

..off to Manchester tonight to see The Killers.