It'll be McAtee and Fellows...
Fonzy
Player Valuation: £1.5m
I still believe TFG will improve us and this was always going to be a huge bump in the road and likely the hardest window to negotiate.
New manager/owner/recruitment team…then because of the mess of club 14 odd players contracts ending at once.
From Jan window on as we hopefully get better they should become easier to spend and attract quality
FinchFarmBlue
Player Valuation: £8m
You could never accuse an Evertonian of being impatient, although it's often confused with a desire and eagerness to improve and get to the point where signings are part of joined up plan where we can make non-youth signings for the future on top of our signings ti improve the first eleven and not just to make up the 25 man squad.
We will get closer to that but it may still be too slow for some as we go along.
FinchFarmBlue
Player Valuation: £8m
If that's the outcome then you could probably expect an older experienced head or two as well to complement them.
Benicetoourboys
Player Valuation: £6m
Think we need 2 new reactions to hit:
1. The "overreaction" button &
2. "I don't think this ones a blue" button
1. The "overreaction" button &
2. "I don't think this ones a blue" button
You're catching on quick, newb.
There is a difference between "would have" and "were"
Why are you getting upset about things that didn't happen?
Haydn
Player Valuation: £10m
I have this recurring dream, whereby our new, super savvy owners, monopolise the US tournament publicity. Upon our arrival in the States, 4 high profile, but anonymous transfers are announced. Their identities are strictly umbongoed.
The only information given, is that we have signed 2 superb full backs, a midfield galactico and a right winger who makes peak Gareth Bale look pedestrian.
Global TV coverage regarding the tournament is all about Everton’s transfer market genius. The international superstars are all said to be on their way to the US, to be unveiled and join their new team mates.
Flight tracking web sites crash under the strain of traffic. Jim White is hoarse, appearing on a non-stop transfer show special, calling it, the most audacious transfer swoop ever. Paul Merson is interviewed and says that we’ve completely broken the transfer market forever.
Bobble posts a cryptic video featuring Moyes on this thread. He says nothing, pulls a dusty suitcase full of banknotes, bearing Arteta’s face, from underneath a cobweb covered bed. The bedroom is plastered with old publicity posters for Joseph and his Technicolour Coat, faded pics of Betty Turpin and long-expired season tickets to the boy’s pen.
Finally, making his exit, Moyes reaches for his pocket and casually throws a knife into a bin. Then, just like an old James Bond movie promo, he turns round menacingly, now holding a massive, fully loaded, Magnum 45.
Who the 4 players are and how we do in the tournament remains a total mystery though. Just as I get to that point, I am constantly woken, by the now all too familiar sogginess, of my newly dampened bedsheets.
Read into that, what you will.
The only information given, is that we have signed 2 superb full backs, a midfield galactico and a right winger who makes peak Gareth Bale look pedestrian.
Global TV coverage regarding the tournament is all about Everton’s transfer market genius. The international superstars are all said to be on their way to the US, to be unveiled and join their new team mates.
Flight tracking web sites crash under the strain of traffic. Jim White is hoarse, appearing on a non-stop transfer show special, calling it, the most audacious transfer swoop ever. Paul Merson is interviewed and says that we’ve completely broken the transfer market forever.
Bobble posts a cryptic video featuring Moyes on this thread. He says nothing, pulls a dusty suitcase full of banknotes, bearing Arteta’s face, from underneath a cobweb covered bed. The bedroom is plastered with old publicity posters for Joseph and his Technicolour Coat, faded pics of Betty Turpin and long-expired season tickets to the boy’s pen.
Finally, making his exit, Moyes reaches for his pocket and casually throws a knife into a bin. Then, just like an old James Bond movie promo, he turns round menacingly, now holding a massive, fully loaded, Magnum 45.
Who the 4 players are and how we do in the tournament remains a total mystery though. Just as I get to that point, I am constantly woken, by the now all too familiar sogginess, of my newly dampened bedsheets.
Read into that, what you will.
I'll leave that one to Freud, thanks.
FFS DION..................... Douglas is ours Now.
Haydn
Player Valuation: £10m
Already consulted Freudian experts. Apparently, one of Freud's theories was that people dream about things that are too embarrassing or uncomfortable for them to admit on a conscious level.
Freud thought that dreams about houses, buildings, football clubs and other hollow structures were often symbols of wombs, birth canals, vaginas--in short, the symbols of female genitalia.
In Freudian theory, bedwetting is often linked to the phallic stage of psychosexual development, specifically the Oedipus complex, and can be associated with trauma, anxiety, or suppressed desires.
Make of that, what you will.
windymiller
Player Valuation: £60m
We do love a Brazilian with a boring name, to be fair. Jo, then Bernard, now Douglas? Is there a Brazilian called Brian? We should be all over that.
Fonzy
Player Valuation: £1.5m
Until we wake up and the buggers joined Brentford
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