When players names aren't needed

[ianefc]

Was listening to Hawksbee and Jacobs on Talksport the other day and during one of there segments they were having a little dig at the tabloids and their writing style. One thing in particular is when the papers describe a player, making it obvious who they are talking about, but then go on to confirm the players name anyway.

The example they gave was when some rag said 'The Fuzzy haired Belgian, Marouanne Fellaini' They argued that the later part was not needed but asked callers to come up with some descriptions of players but without the name.

One got in touch and said 'The tall, Robotic Stoke striker'

Thought it would be fun to lob so descriptive titles in here without using the players name like

The Fat Granny Shagger

or

The Diving DJ Decker

And so on

 

[Baines' left foot]

The useless blonde haired pointing [Poor language removed].

 

[bluejock]

That blonde Spanish ladyboy that used to be ok but is now pump

 

[The-Golden-Vision]

That beaver faced tit.

 

[ijjysmith]

The lad from Barca

 

[The-Golden-Vision]

The milkman.

 

[chrissyjack]

That Thunderbastard shooter

 

[roydo]

That mates wife shagging blert

 

[Fensta]

Overrated Welsh ponce.

 

[Azzurri]

That blonde Spanish ladyboy that used to be ok but is now pump

Leave our Gerard out of it.



The one who's wife's a great pancake tosser.

 

[TippEverton]

"The model pro who gave years shagging his brothers missus"

 

[DanEFC92]

The lad who only passes backwards.

 

[BigBlueConk]

The Premierships leading scorer of deflected goals.

 

[Reidy's Bottle Of Grecian]

The scorer of the most goals ever against LFC

 

[Reidy's Bottle Of Grecian]

The dentally endowed racist