Funny things you've overheard

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Brownie86

Brownie86

Player Valuation: £8m
I just heard a woman say to her friend:

"I fancy a Maccy D's after shopping. I'm only going to get a happy meal though, yeah. I'm on a diet."

I thought I would post it here to see if anyone else had some good ones.
 

In The Filling Station on Country Rd, Christmas week.

"What do you want then love? Bread...milk...sugar...mince pies? What do you mean? Likes ones with actual mince in or them fruity ones you have at Christmas?"
 
Sitting on a bus with my headphones in, two 16/17 year old girls chatting away a few seats back. Skip song and for about 5 seconds, the music goes completely off.

"I always get called beautiful. Hate it so much, so annoying."

100% true story.
 
LocalNative said:
Sitting on a bus with my headphones in, two 16/17 year old girls chatting away a few seats back. Skip song and for about 5 seconds, the music goes completely off.

"I always get called beautiful. Hate it so much, so annoying."

100% true story.
Click to expand...

Im sure that would get annoying!
 

was at the cricket sunday, needed the loo so go to a cubicle to relieve myself, wait in a little que with a few other lads, one of the toilets opens up, the next lad in the que walks in, seemed fine.

Half a minute passes and the loudest vomit noises for about a minute, lads all in hysterics listening to it. He then walks out, tissue in hand as if nothing has happened.
 
True to my word....sat on a bus near a middle aged woman and a lad about 18....the lad lit up a joint and started 2 smoke it,the woman turns and says gis a bit,lad response no **** off with the woman responding am telling you gis a bit cos am your ****ing mother....I let out a loud laugh haha...100% true....
 
Really, really old one that I only heard cos I was being sneaky.


'I can't get hard'.

'You better get that fcuking thing hard and ram it up me arse, cos you're not getting out of here otherwise'.
 

Our On Set Nurse (formally an Air Hostess) at the Coffee machine the other day "GAWD I'VE SLEPT WITH SO MANY MEN I CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER"
 
I once heard my mate's mum screaming "You're the daddy!" over and over at his dad as i was walking up their garden path to see if my mate was coming for a game of football.

What makes it worse is that five years later the mate shouted exactly the same thing after an impressive checkout whilst playing darts in the local pub. Hate to think how that could have passed down a generation
 

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