'Breaking News that nobody is interested in' ...

[Bungle]

Just got matched with a bit of a worldie on Tinder. Let's see how long it takes me to bugger it up. My money is on 5 messages or less.

Tell her you meet men off internet forums, they love that kind of stuff....

 

[Bungle]

Good luck Butters, make it happen mate, don't take no for an answer, unless it starts getting a bit rapey in which case probably best to take no for an answer.

Or make use of the river once he's finished with her?

 

[Baines' left foot]

Tell her you meet men off internet forums, they love that kind of stuff....

I don't want her drenching her knickers right away Bungz. Jeeeeez.

 

[Big Fat Sam]

Dead excited tbf.

 

[Ihaters]

Or make use of the river once he's finished with her?

Exactly, once you've finished your nice chat and things have gone well, go for a swim with her in the river I believe is what Bungle means here...

 

[Pat's Van]

Dead excited tbf.

try flopping "little butters" out midway through your picnic

don't make it obvious, just flop it out there when she's not looking

when she spies it, her reaction will tell you if she's the one or not

thank me later

 

[Bungle]

Exactly, once you've finished your nice chat and things have gone well, go for a swim with her in the river I believe is what Bungle means here...

Correct.

Good luck @butters, you've mellowed a bit lately, god knows how laid back you'll be if you're getting laid regularly

 

[Big Fat Sam]

Correct.

Good luck @butters, you've mellowed a bit lately, god knows how laid back you'll be if you're getting laid regularly

pmsl.

 

[Ihaters]

Correct.

Good luck @butters, you've mellowed a bit lately, god knows how laid back you'll be if you're getting laid regularly

If he gets a long term bird, he'll be a strung out, drug abusing, alcoholic, smoking 50 a day like the rest of us. But he'll be getting some from a fit chick so its well worth it.

 

[Big Fat Sam]

She's insisted on going home first from work so she best be dolling herself up for our river date.

(although she's lovely in dressed-down hardly any make up anyways tbh)

 

[Ihaters]

She's insisted on going home first from work so she best be dolling herself up for our river date.

(although she's lovely in dressed-down hardly any make up anyways tbh)

Yeah, or saying hi to her boyfriend.

 

[Bungle]

She's insisted on going home first from work so she best be dolling herself up for our river date.

(although she's lovely in dressed-down hardly any make up anyways tbh)

Follow her home mate, girls love that as well, makes them feel protected. Give her a wave when she looks out the window when she's getting changed as well just so she knows you've made the effort to climb the garden fence to make sure she got upstairs ok.

 

[Walken]

I think this is genuinely one of those situations where you can ask yourself, what would mick do?

 

[Goat]

She's insisted on going home first from work so she best be dolling herself up for our river date.

(although she's lovely in dressed-down hardly any make up anyways tbh)

Probably gonna clean her clunge, it will be a mess in this hot weather, like a john west factory.

 

[Rugby Toffee]

Allardyce has kept his job and Ranieri has lost his