Recent content by Toby the Rhymedog

  1. Toby the Rhymedog

    Transfer Rumour Andriy Yarmolenko

    I really don't think I could risk it, I've had a full cut of brisket, Oh what the hell? A treat would be swell, *Opens mouth, receives biscuit
  2. Toby the Rhymedog

    Transfer Rumour Andriy Yarmolenko

    I would truly love Yarmolenko, To be like a pre-Chelsea Shevchenko, Our attacking would flow, Though our midfield's still slow, Gaz gets skinned like a d1ck dipped in Kenco
  3. Toby the Rhymedog

    Transfer Rumour Andriy Yarmolenko

    I hope that this deal stays intact, If not, then the board should be sacked, But if you want the truth, I'd stake tail and tooth, On the reporting of Sportofact
  4. Toby the Rhymedog

    It was not my intent to mislead, But since Woolly Blue has decreed, To let everyone know, Who...

    It was not my intent to mislead, But since Woolly Blue has decreed, To let everyone know, Who lies below, This dog is a dying breed But let that not detract from what matters, Busters and bozos still chatter, It's up to you now, To fulfil your vow, And serve them negs on a platter
  5. Toby the Rhymedog

    Lukaku

    On this issue, I must lay down the gavel, Arguments against him truly unravel, If he persists, With goals and assists, It matters not his first touch is like Saville
  6. Toby the Rhymedog

    Well, it depends on what that love entails, Is it a platonic alliance of males? Or is it beyond...

    Well, it depends on what that love entails, Is it a platonic alliance of males? Or is it beyond, That man and beast bond, The kind of "friendship" they practice in Wales?
  7. Toby the Rhymedog

    Roberto Martinez discussion

    We have a miserly, tight-fisted owner, Do bi-monthly sackings give you boners? If you're gonna get stroppy When waters get choppy, Then go and support Barceloner
  8. Toby the Rhymedog

    Leon Osman

    Walken, you blind, WUMmy toff, Your appraisal of Osman is off, I command thee, disrobe While I, Doctor Tobe Grab your balls and tell you to koff He's done nothing to earn your derision, What he lacks in pace, he makes up with vision, Though I agree, It is sad that just he, Can make passes with...
  9. Toby the Rhymedog

    Jagielka

    You got sumthin 'gainst Mike cos' he's black? Mo'f**ka, don't make me go on the attack, I'll take yo girl for a meal, Gets her in my automobile, Hump her leg and never call her back
  10. Toby the Rhymedog

    Barkley upfront

    I thank you, but you could spend years, And come up emptier than Paul Gasgoine's beers Give up your cause No one knew who I was, Before I put on floppy ears
  11. Toby the Rhymedog

    Worst Player of the Season

    A certain Belgian, in whom faith is eroding That penalty thing was quite goading His best times have passed, And he can't even last, Half an hour without hamstrings exploding
  12. Toby the Rhymedog

    Barkley upfront

    Sapie, 88th of his name, And myself are not one and the same, But it seems to me, That he and BMG For this Rhymedog, take most of the blame
  13. Toby the Rhymedog

    Barkley upfront

    I, for one, agree with your cause, We're really clutching at straws, Barkley is ace, But he'd be more out of place, Than cocks on the end of my paws
  14. Toby the Rhymedog

    Lies, Damned Lies and Statistics

    Which way did he go, Timmy Howard? After the World Cup, in which he towered, Now he just sits there, Into the distance he stares, Like a virgin that's being deflowered
  15. Toby the Rhymedog

    James McCarthy

    This season has been so terribly dire, Not even McCarthy can escape our ire, He's done much to carry, A terrible Barry, Who must have Robbie's wife over a fire
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