John Osters Love Child
Player Valuation: £6m
Martinez appears to be one of those people that manages to fail upwards. He gets Wigan relegated and gets a job with us (who were at that time quite comfortably best of the rest). He drags us down to mid table mediocrity playing awful football whilst destroying the fitness of all our players, gets the sack, pockets a cool 10million and manages to land one of the most coveted international gigs in the game. I can only assume when he is sacked from the Belgium job he will become Barca's manager or Fifa President.








