The Johnny 'Colossus' Heitinga Appreciation Thread

Keep or get rid?

  • Keep

    Votes: 24 19.8%
  • Get rid

    Votes: 97 80.2%

  • Total voters
    121
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John%20Heitinga_getty.jpg
 
Imagine Johnny in Corrie, he would play some sexy new Dutch factory worker.

Liz McDonald would be sniffing, Deidre would bag him first tho, poor Johnny.


Clearly he would be there to model the new line in mens trunks, Carla and Rosie would be fighting to check 'which side' and Shaun would be discussing with Hayley how pretty his lips are.
Kev would take 1 look at him and just top himself there and then, then the garage would be taken over by Tyrone who'd turn it into a club with Terry Duckworth on the door with his mate from Liverpool, Barry Grant.
 

******* love him, he's a beast.


And to think it was such a drama when we lost Lescott. Who is Lescott next to Heitinga? All the things Heitinga brings to the team, incomparable.
 

I reckson he will transform into a 40 foot blue monster and eat the away fans.

Outstanding.

And of course he'd get a three match suspension for eating the away fans whereas if Michael Carrick or John Obi Mikel ate away fans, they'd just get a slap on the wrist and told "don't do it again."
 
Did anyone notice him having a bit of a go at Landon in the USA vs Netherlands friendly? Play was stopped and I remember him giving Landon a bit of a push. Wasn't anything that serious but it stood out to me. I forget what time this happened and I don't have the match recorded. He might not have heard the whistle. :D

Serious competitor he is. Love it.
 

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