What not to do at your wedding

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Eusebio said:
I was stinking drunk at my wedding a few years ago, me and the new Mrs had been arguing over the seating of certain guests, she loves the sound of her own voice. A bit later on I was outside talking to her Mum who was also drunk and as we were talking she kept touching me every time she laughed, her Mum is stunning, a bit like Stifflers Mum off American Pie. I made a joke and put my hand on her leg AND kept it there for what seemed like ages, she never said anything and we carried on talking, she looked at me and smiled and I threw the lips on her. I don't remember if she was kissing me back but it felt fantastic. One of my cousins was outside as well and said "what the [Poor language removed] are you doing?" Next thing I remember there's about 20 people outside, my wife screaming in my face, her Mum oblivious sitting there smoking and me saying "I thought it was you, it was an accident, look at the state of me" I got dragged away by one of my family members and got an absolute bollocking. It all got sorted out, the Mrs came round in the end and we've been happily married ever since!
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All weddings in Blackpool go like this?
 

We planned ours for June when there was no football, she wanted a May wedding but it had to thought about before saying no. To say its a bit awkward when her Mum comes round is an understatement, I always ensure I'm out somewhere, probably playing golf with her Dad, the irony of it!
 
SerenityNigh said:
Doesn't sound like it was his happiest day. Hope his golf buddies helped him out.
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I play golf with him and his mates every now and then and I sometimes wonder if I'm gonna come home tied up in the boot. He's been fine with me like nothing ever happened, think he sees me as the son he never had. He's very laid back and I'm quite sure his mrs is sleeping with others anyway.
 

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