Retail Workers Union

[The Legend of Southall]

I figured an international break is a good time for something like this.

This is a place for us retail workers to post funny stories, or just generally have a moan, about customers. What they do to annoy us, and how hilarious it is when they get it wrong.

So feel free to vent or share stories, and remember the threads motto:

Retail; if it wasn't for customers, it would be the best job in the world.

 

[PKwalnuts]

Can I speak to your manager?

 

[The binman chronicles]

I figured an international break is a good time for something like this.

This is a place for us retail workers to post funny stories, or just generally have a moan, about customers. What they do to annoy us, and how hilarious it is when they get it wrong.

So feel free to vent or share stories, and remember the threads motto:

Retail; if it wasn't for customers, it would be the best job in the world.

But do you call it a shop or a store?

 

[The Legend of Southall]

But do you call it a shop or a store?

Hell usually

 

[The Legend of Southall]

Can I speak to your manager?

Our complaints department is open 7pm-8pm every Sunday

 

[Dharma]

I figured an international break is a good time for something like this.

This is a place for us retail workers to post funny stories, or just generally have a moan, about customers. What they do to annoy us, and how hilarious it is when they get it wrong.

So feel free to vent or share stories, and remember the threads motto:

Retail; if it wasn't for customers, it would be the best job in the world.

Disgusted that you've had to face a maskless public during the pandemic. I hope one day those responsible will be held to account.

 

[The Legend of Southall]

Disgusted that you've had to face a maskless public during the pandemic. I hope one day those responsible will be held to account.

Nah, it's not been too bad. I was furloughed to begin with, before they changed the definition of key worker.

My employer decided to top all our wages up to 100%. So I was basically being paid to sit on my arse in my pjarmas all day. I was living my best life.

It's where I came up with the motto

 

[tommye]

Great thread.


Would read again.

 

[The Legend of Southall]

Great thread.


Would read again.

It's been better than socks at least

 

[wainy]

I got throw out of sports direct once for putting one of them massive Arsene Wenger style coats on and then standing around doing managerial poses and shouting for offside. Wish I was lying.

 

[The Legend of Southall]

At the risk of this thread turning into me just talking to myself, I'll provide a couple of examples.

Customers who come in asking me for advice. They then proceed to talk over me, answer their own questions (usually wrongly), then won't listen when I finally do get a word in. You just know they're the type of customer to go somewhere else and say "the man in your other shop said it was ok"

Customers who very audibly tell you they don't trust you with their keys. I'm not sure what they're expecting me to do? I don't know where they live, and what good would stealing their cars do me? In both scenarios the police could easily track any theft to me.

 

[Alanbileysfeathercut]

​

I was in buying the wfe some new underwear and asked the assistant, “Are these knickers satin?"
"No” she said, “They’re brand new...”

 

[coollino]

Worked with some absolute legends at Asda.

One guy built this own mechanical fishing rod thing to pull trolleys out of the nearby river. He used to fish the trolleys out the river on his days off and clean them all up. The managers hated it but we used to cheer him on from the staff room

 

[coollino]

I worked in the bakery, 6am to 2pm.

Used to go out the night before with my uniform in a backpack. Take a few love hearts, get changed at 530am somewhere, rock up to work all chipper. Be best friends with the people in their 70's who used to come in at 7am for a chat. Start to come down at midday, I used to go into the freezer to eat loads of cookie dough which got me to the end of the shift.

Halcyon daze

 

[nsno-chris]

At the risk of this thread turning into me just talking to myself, I'll provide a couple of examples.

Customers who come in asking me for advice. They then proceed to talk over me, answer their own questions (usually wrongly), then won't listen when I finally do get a word in. You just know they're the type of customer to go somewhere else and say "the man in your other shop said it was ok"

Customers who very audibly tell you they don't trust you with their keys. I'm not sure what they're expecting me to do? I don't know where they live, and what good would stealing their cars do me? In both scenarios the police could easily track any theft to me.

“Hi mate, got these in a size 9”

“Gis ye car keys and I’ll tell you”