tungetango
Did IQs just drop sharply while I was away?
Didn't find a thread about this so please point me in the right direction if we do have one.
Surely I can't be the only part-time parent in here so I just wanted to have a conversation going about it if anybody wants or cares. I would also like to hear from those of you growing up in,or having grown up in two homes or any other combinations that are out there.
I'll ramble on for a little bit about my stuff and hopefully some of you will join in.
Been having my kids part-time for over 5 years now.The last two years half the time every other week and roughly 40% of the time before that in a rather irratic schedule due to me working shifts.
Not ideal for the kids but my desire to have them as much as I possibly can is rather strong.
They are 10 (girl) and 12 (boy) now and I guess they just have an almost lost memory of just one home. First years they naturally had a lot of sad feelings about it and it was (and still is) really hard to explain to a 5 year old and a 7 year old why splitting up was a sensible thing to do. They also were the first kids in their classes/kindergarten group having to deal with stuff like this.
Now they just roll along with it seems and have lots of friends in the same situation,but they are showing some quite differing behaviour depending if they are with me or their mother. Especially the boy. Guess that's natural but would like to hear from you about your experiences about that ( whithout it becoming a bashing of mothers , I suspect we are overly represented by men in here) .
I don't think myself to be perfect in any way about parenting but then again there are reasons to why we split up. There have been quite a few rounds where opinions have differed enormously to say the least and I must say it is really hard to contain the frustration some times.
I try to never badmouth their mother but must admit to one occasion of letting myself go on their mother front of them. That was bad. It took me hours with the kids to calm everything down. Not my proudest moment to say the least,no matter the reason. So I actually understand that some people do. I don't defend it ,but I understand it happening. Contradicting behaviour in bringing up the kids are of course not ideal ,how do you deal with it?
Luckily the homes are not far apart (although sometimes I wish they were a bit further away
) so they don't have to relate to having seperate friends at mom's house and friends at dad's house. And they live close to their school in both homes.
Anyways,just trying to start a conversation here. Feel free to ask about anything,I believe it can only be a good thing to do.
Surely I can't be the only part-time parent in here so I just wanted to have a conversation going about it if anybody wants or cares. I would also like to hear from those of you growing up in,or having grown up in two homes or any other combinations that are out there.
I'll ramble on for a little bit about my stuff and hopefully some of you will join in.
Been having my kids part-time for over 5 years now.The last two years half the time every other week and roughly 40% of the time before that in a rather irratic schedule due to me working shifts.
Not ideal for the kids but my desire to have them as much as I possibly can is rather strong.
They are 10 (girl) and 12 (boy) now and I guess they just have an almost lost memory of just one home. First years they naturally had a lot of sad feelings about it and it was (and still is) really hard to explain to a 5 year old and a 7 year old why splitting up was a sensible thing to do. They also were the first kids in their classes/kindergarten group having to deal with stuff like this.
Now they just roll along with it seems and have lots of friends in the same situation,but they are showing some quite differing behaviour depending if they are with me or their mother. Especially the boy. Guess that's natural but would like to hear from you about your experiences about that ( whithout it becoming a bashing of mothers , I suspect we are overly represented by men in here) .
I don't think myself to be perfect in any way about parenting but then again there are reasons to why we split up. There have been quite a few rounds where opinions have differed enormously to say the least and I must say it is really hard to contain the frustration some times.
I try to never badmouth their mother but must admit to one occasion of letting myself go on their mother front of them. That was bad. It took me hours with the kids to calm everything down. Not my proudest moment to say the least,no matter the reason. So I actually understand that some people do. I don't defend it ,but I understand it happening. Contradicting behaviour in bringing up the kids are of course not ideal ,how do you deal with it?
Luckily the homes are not far apart (although sometimes I wish they were a bit further away
) so they don't have to relate to having seperate friends at mom's house and friends at dad's house. And they live close to their school in both homes.Anyways,just trying to start a conversation here. Feel free to ask about anything,I believe it can only be a good thing to do.
