It takes all sorts

[davek]

http://www.thisisthewestcountry.co....ring_himself_in_slurry_for_third_time/?ref=mr

"A man found naked in a field amongst cow dung and mud had been sexually pleasuring himself, a court has heard. When police officers arrived soon after, they found him covered in a large amount of slurry and mud, in a quagmire, surrounded by tissues"


...now read on if you dare.

 

[chicoazul]

When asked in court about about seeking sexual gratification in cow dung, Mr Truscott became and defensive and shouted "That's bullsh*t" to stunned onlookers "female faeces does nothing for me".

 

[davek]

PMSL at that:

"The family have to regularly check their livestock, outbuildings and equipment, as he has masturbated in a muck spreader".

 

[chicoazul]

When they say "muck spreader" were they referring to their machinery or his?

 

[roydo]

Not news down here. One bloke got done for "pleasuring" a cow, whilst on a small step ladder!!

 

[RFUS]

What a moron!






I've never been caught.

 

[roydo]

Quiet cow, or hidden step ladder?

 

[RFUS]

Quiet cow, or hidden step ladder?

I'm just a sex ninja.

I'm in, then I'm out, and you never even notice.









...wait a second.

 

[roydo]

Seems the same with the missus. Oh well.

 

[ricardobee]

I don't get the tissues bit, you'd wipe it on the cows nose or something...or maybe wipe your helmet on the white bit of the cow.

 

[bluebloodinmyveins]

Gives a whole new meaning to the term "farm hand"

 

[davek]

I don't get the tissues bit, you'd wipe it on the cows nose or something...or maybe wipe your helmet on the white bit of the cow.

PMSL.

 

[The-Golden-Vision]

I don't get the tissues bit, you'd wipe it on the cows nose or something...or maybe wipe your helmet on the white bit of the cow.

Repped. That image will never leave my head

 

[linglong]

I don't get the tissues bit, you'd wipe it on the cows nose or something...or maybe wipe your helmet on the white bit of the cow.

ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

 

[mezzrow]

I don't get the tissues bit, you'd wipe it on the cows nose or something...or maybe wipe your helmet on the white bit of the cow.

a: That's not how cow tipping is done, y'know. Not hatin, just sayin...

b: What, did Elsie say you were sharp? ('sax players...' he mutters, shakes head)