Funniest fan abuse towards a club, manager or player

bluejock · January 17, 2014

Bit close to the bone but after the revelations that Gazza had been beating his wife, home fans around Scotland used to taunt him with

"Cheryl's black and blue, she's black and blue, she's black and blue she's blaaack and....."

roydo · January 17, 2014

Celtic fans song for John Hartson I like.

"All things bright and beautiful, all creatures great and small,
all things bright and beautiful, John Hartsons ate them all"

bluejock · January 17, 2014

Can't remember the team involved but they were 3-0 down and the fans sang "4-3, we're gonna win 4-3..."

At 4-0 they sang "5-4, we're gonna win 5-4..."

At 5-0 it was "we're gonna win 6-5"

And at 6-0 they sang "If you'd settle for a draw, clap your hands"

Moomin · January 17, 2014

Not football, but the best shout I've ever heard ever.

Was at a U2 concert back in 2005, it all went quiet and Bono was just clapping his hands every two seconds. This went on for a while until he said " Every time I clap my hands, a child in Africa dies " some fella shouted out " WELL STOP FCUKING CLAPPING THEN YOU [Poor language removed] "

blue4eva77 · January 17, 2014

bluejock said:
Can't remember the team involved but they were 3-0 down and the fans sang "4-3, we're gonna win 4-3..."

At 4-0 they sang "5-4, we're gonna win 5-4..."

At 5-0 it was "we're gonna win 6-5"

And at 6-0 they sang "If you'd settle for a draw, clap your hands"

I remember Man City doing something similar a few years back

dholliday · January 17, 2014

Moomin said:
Not football, but the best shout I've ever heard ever.

Was at a U2 concert back in 2005, it all went quiet and Bono was just clapping his hands every two seconds. This went on for a while until he said " Every time I clap my hands, a child in Africa dies " some fella shouted out " WELL STOP FCUKING CLAPPING THEN YOU [Poor language removed] "

funny, but not true:

http://www.snopes.com/music/artists/bono.asp

http://www.news.com.au/entertainment/music/photos-e6frfn09-1226175275197?page=2

nigelcoyb · January 17, 2014

ijjysmith said:
A few years ago, on a boxing day, my old man and me went to see Sheffield United vs Blackpool. It was the nearest alright ish match on, so thought we'd go.
We sat in the away end as it's always better there isn't it, but about half way through the first half this utterly smashed bloke started comparing the referee to Darth Vadar, and the whole match to Star Wars related things. It was so weird. He was proper shouting stuff.

Like:

- 'Use the force Ref'
- 'Neil Warnock is your father'
- 'Bramall Lane is the Death Star'

And so on.

Then in the second half Blackpool were shooting our way, so Paddy Kenny had his back to us. So looked like this:

So pipes up the same man;

'WHAT KIND OF NAME IS KENNY VALAD?!'

Incredible bantz.

Tumbleweed blowing everywhere.

steken1 · January 17, 2014

Best one I've heard. The whole of Goodison was singing 'there's only one Jagielka, One Jagielka' went on for ages.

Soon as it finished some fella shouted 'Cos it's a made up name'.

Was in stitches

IRO1977 · January 17, 2014

I remember reading about a league 2 player trying a shot from 35 yards which went well wide, his manager shouted at him "[Poor language removed] sakes, if you could score from there you wouldn't be playing for us!"

royalblue66 · January 17, 2014

Can't remember the goalkeeper who said to his gaffa "sorry I boss I should have closed my legs, his Gaffa replied
"Pity your old lady hadn't"

Baines' left foot · January 17, 2014

IRO1977 said:
I remember reading about a league 2 player trying a shot from 35 yards which went well wide, his manager shouted at him "[Poor language removed] sakes, if you could score from there you wouldn't be playing for us!"

uncle bill's moggie said:
Can't remember the goalkeeper who said to his gaffa "sorry I boss I should have closed my legs, his Gaffa replied
"Pity your old lady hadn't"

Hahahaha these two are excellent!

centralTon · January 18, 2014

After a 9 game streak without a win and only 2 league wins all season, heard at todays Livingston v Morton game by the Morton fans;

"We're winning away,
we're winning awaaay,
how ****e must you be,
we're winning away"

Put a wee smile on my face.

Lee Smith · January 18, 2014

centralTon said:
After a 9 game streak without a win and only 2 league wins all season, heard at todays Livingston v Morton game by the Morton fans;

"We're winning away,
we're winning awaaay,
how ****e must you be,
we're winning away"

Put a wee smile on my face.

Pretty sure Villa fans were also singing that at Goodison last season when they went two nil up.