Not Safe For Work! Fifty Shades Of Andy Gray

[ijjysmith]

My new Twitter obsession: @50ShadesOfAndyGray

He enters her & sighs mournfully. Even his thick power rod finds her pink pleasure palace too large. 'What's Up?' She asks. 'I'm in acres of space.'

'How will you do me?' She asks 'Doggy, Missionary, Cowgirl?' she begs, craving his answer. He responds confidently. 'The Makelele position'.

'69' he barks. The two chambermaids obey his order. He sits and watches them pleasure each other before his eyes. 'This is end to end stuff!'

She lay trembling, no one had ever screwed her like that. He lay over her panting body and looked at his throbbing sword. 'Take a bow son.'

And many more.

 

[tommye]

brilliant.

*heads to twitter

 

[The T-Dex]

You naughty boy.

Ace stuff though.

 

[ijjysmith]

Another one for good measure:

After a five hour romp, they shared a cigarette. 'Was I any good?' she asked nervously. 'You'd struggle on a cold night at The Britannia'

 

[ijjysmith]

And another:

She yanks down his boxers. She panics at the sight of his giant throbbing shaft of meat. He says 'You've got a real mountain to climb now!'

 

[The T-Dex]

"I'm not ready yet" she said but he hammered away mercilessly, until he burst inside her like a volcano "There's no stopping those!" he said

Love this one

 

[Bigmaclad]

Hahahahhahahahahaha.

He enters her & sighs mournfully. Even his thick power rod finds her pink palace too large. “What’s up?â€￾ She asks. “I’m in acres of space.â€￾

 

[Summerskin]

Added,

"This is end to end stuff!" being especially brilliant.

 

[EFC David]

50 Shades Of Purple

My new book.

About a woman.

Who wouldn't listen.

 

[Nails]

Found this on Twitter today. Fkn hilarious. This was my favourite:

Suddenly he stopped pounding her. Something was wrong. "Your condom" she said red faced "it came off in me." He grinned "pick that one out!"