4 things that makes you feel a proper tit, 1 that makes you feel boss

[chicoazul]

1 - slipping on a surface in front of other people managing to keep your balance but pure looking a tit
2 - forgetting to put a belt on in the office that day
3 - calling your boss Dad or babe
4 - over cooking any steak further than medium rare

1 - that mint leaves shower gel around your hoop

 

[Cena]

1) Not being able to talk to pretty girls properly

2) Overcooking a poached egg

3) Not being good at DIY

4) Not standing up to people enough (too serious that one)


1) Coming out with a one-liner that the whole group laughs at

 

[bluejock]

1. A fart in front of the in laws you assumed would be silent
2. Going through your phone the morning after a night on the ale
3. The mechanic at the garage judging you because you don't know how to fix a car
4. Putting all your shopping through the check out and realising your wallet is at home

1. When your phone rings dead loud in public and Z Cars is your ringtone.

 

[ilikecheese]

1- when that fart has a little something extra, and you're at work
2- asking a women how far along she is in her pregnacy when she ain't preggers
3- having someone come up to you who totally knows you, but you don't remember them at all
4- telling an offensive gay joke in front of someone who is gay that you didn't know was (he laughed and later told me the deal...totally let me off the hook...still felt like a massive tit)

1- sticking a 9 iron from 140 yards (128 meters) to six inches for an easy tap in birdie

 

[Cena]

1. A fart in front of the in laws you assumed would be silent
2. Going through your phone the morning after a night on the ale
3. The mechanic at the garage judging you because you don't know how to fix a car
4. Putting all your shopping through the check out and realising your wallet is at home

1. When your phone rings dead loud in public and Z Cars is your ringtone.

I'm a bad sufferer of this. Horrible viewing on a sunday morning

 

[bluejock]

I'm a bad sufferer of this. Horrible viewing on a sunday morning

Snapchat is a lifesaver. If you can't see it, it never happened.

 

[Azzurri]

1) Standing there while your bird's ma goes mental at her for 'not spending enough time together' when I'm the reason they don't

2) Having a piss and knowing the fella next to you is onto the fact you had sugar puffs for breakfast

3) Thinking you're Jose Mourinho after a drink and telling your kid who's 5x better than you and likely to get his YTS at the end of the year why he's sh*te and needs to 'stop going into tackles side on'

4) Jumping onto a bed in IKEA and breaking the [Poor language removed] thing


1) Sprinting. Probably makes me sound like some gormless Forrest Gump but I love the feeling of just running flat out on a good surface

 

[WA Toffee]

1. Pushing a door that says pull
2. Pulling a door which says push
3. Sitting on the wrong seat on a plane
4. Going to the shops to get milk, buy bread, chocolate and juice but forget the milk

1. Drilling 2 holes in a wall and having them line up perfectly the first time

 

[Fensta]

1. Letting on to someone you thought you knew then realise it's not them.
2. Puking in public
3. Trying to buy stuff from a shop when too stoned and feeling horribly awkward.
4. Holding up traffic at the tunnel toll booth cos you dropped the coins out the window onto the floor.
5. Accidentally swearing at ya maa or daa.

1. Walking around in a boss new pair of trainers.

 

[Leedslee24]

1.walking into work when your not due back...
2.walking up to the first tee with people u don't know watching and making a complete hash of your shot
3.going in for a handshake as someone goes to wave at u...
4.finishing early in the bedroom after telling her u was the boss

1.knowing you bossed it in the bedroom...

 

[Baines' left foot]

1. Going for a poo on a train to London and forgetting to lock the door.... someone opened the door and saw me wiping my arse.

2. Slipping on a banana skin. Yes, I have actually done this.

3. When you try and give that fart a bit too much of a push, and it's more than a fart. The result alerts you with the force of one thousand shots of espresso.

4. Scraping my wheels against a kerb.


1. Looking in your wallet the morning after a night out and finding notes.

 

[Maxwell]

Speaking of having poo's on a train. I was in dire need of one coming back from London and thought i got on the right train, engine was running but it was completely empty. Went to the loo and done a really bad poo (morning after poppers kind of thing). Then the engine went off, leaving me unable to flush or even open the door. Had to press the emergency alarm to get someone to let me out while all the poo was still there in the bowl unable to flush away. Oh how we laughed.