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"I have a coach. He'll be announced before 12 June. Vítor Pereira? You know his movements. It's easy to deduce whether or not it's him." PdC

I admire the dedication. Just like Faz's with Bobby M. I think Team Pereira has championed their guy for so long that they would follow this recently unknown man to the ends of the earth, wherever his next job may be. ''New manager of Botswana, you say?"

VP: ''Whatever Bobby's on, I'll do it for a tenner less.'' BK: ''Sold! to the man in the armband.''

That Martinez has agreed terms. Just seen it.

Whats he said? Come onnnnn....

Its still real to me dammit!!

Its 99% Martinez isnt it, lets face the inevitable truth here. In which case, I'd just like to say its been a pleasure serving with you boys. See you for the next Everton X-Factor.

To be fair the guardian article offers no quotes and contains words such as 'expected' 'understood to have' and 'may'. Just like VP was 'understood to have' been given a pre-contract (whatever that means)

It's illegal in 9 countries.

So we've accepted its Martinez based on the guardian article?

Theres one on that royalbluemersey site isnt there? Last time i checked Vitor had over half the votes.

Wheres that image of him with that crazy look in his eyes? A couple of looks like that to the lads and english wont even be necessary.

As long as he can say 'Get ball in net' we should be sound.

It's all been a sick joke and Moyes is still in charge. ZING!

He also said that Porto wanted an Everton player as compensation for the out-of-contract Pereira.

Oh jesus, another name in the mix. Alright then Kev, fire over your cat's cv and we'll take a view lad.

Pretty please? Pretty sure ive circumvented some forum rules there, but its all for a laugh eh? (and for those in Team Vitor)

Someone fire that image into the forum will they? (Not enough posts)

imageshack.us/photo/my-images/839/98932586.jpg/

Ok fair point, jumped the gun a bit there perhaps. With BK I guess its never that simple? This really is going to drag on now isnt it? There's another twist to be had in this tale though, im sure. In any case it looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue.