ijjysmith
Calm
White iphone
Wears face masks
Doesn't like coffee
The evidence is stacking up against you
Mate you've had sex with the same amount of blokes as you have women.
White iphone
Wears face masks
Doesn't like coffee
The evidence is stacking up against you
Mate you've had sex with the same amount of blokes as you have women.
Took you a day to come up with that?
Only just read it.
Still a woman
Excellent come back. X
Got a wee problem here.
Right, so my mate and his girlfriend came back from London this weekend as it was his birthday. I saw them on Friday night as I picked them up from the train station and was talking about going out the following night (last night). I didn't get a text or call all day and couldn't get through to anyone, didn't think much of it. I fell asleep in the evening until about 11pm. I woke up thinking SH*T, yet no calls or texts. I turned my phone off and then on again and then a few missed calls and texts came through. Obviously my phone is utter wank. By this time though I was sweaty as [Poor language removed] for falling asleep with the heating on and wasn't at all ready, so I swerved it.
I feel terrible now though and I'm really not sure how to excuse myself.
I've been practising all week
Well the way I see it you can either tell the truth or fake your own death....
When you moving to London? Gotta be soon now.
Boss.
Utterly boss.
Really can't wait for you!
I'm very excited and hideously unorganised.
Literally not bought one thing in prep yet
You need like a pen and a pad.
And a pan. And some pasta.
All the P's really.
I'll add that to my list alongside pies potatoes and pencils