2do-list

[when i score we riot]

Here's my 2do-list for the coming months then. Feel free to add to it.

* Finish 7th. Fail to gain anything else significant from our results.
* Sell Yak and Yobo off.
* Fail to get rid of Vaughan. End up loaning him out. AGAIN. To League 1.
* Fail at retaining Eric Dier. Or, hopefully, solve him permanently. Chances are the former, though.
* Release random academy dross like Nsiala or whatever on a free.
* Barkley to have a setback, out till next November. Career broken already.
* Release new kits to a mixed reaction from fans. We already know what they look like and are underwhelmed.
* Go on an overhyped preseason tour. End up losing money on it.
* Cahill, Coleman and Distin injured in preseason.
* Lose 1-3 against Preston in the same game with said injuries.
* Vellios and Gueye to score ****loads of goals in the friendlies, yet fail to get real gametime in august.
* Let Heitinga go in a flurry of bitterness and unfortunately worded OS articles. Sold for £6m to Schalke.
* The Heitinga deal was supposed to be a swap for Huntelaar, but that transfer obviously falls through.
* Sign Elmander on a free. Break wage structure. Two weeks after arrival, his new home in Liverpool is broken into in a racially motivated anti-swede assault. The trauma keeps him out of action till christmas.
* Get into a mess over signing Charlie Adam. Ultimately fail. He scores against us at castle greyskull a few months later.
* LCAB's internet connection breaks for 3 days in the middle of august. The entire world wide web is thrust into a panic.
* Billy to give up, retire from football and become a russian sports pundit.
* Fixture computer to give us our first game against QPR away. It is not broadcast. We lose.
* Saha scores his first goal the day before transfer deadline day. We lose 1-4 to WBA again.
* We sign noone the following day.
* But we sell Neville to LA Galaxy. Anichebe is made captain.
* Elstone writes a blog. About how our cooperation with Thailand is going sooo well.


I don't mean to be negative, i'm just kinda understimulated i guess.
Bookmark this, lets' see how right i am come fall.

Otherwise, happy easter.

 

[Jamo Martinez]

*Along with Elmander, we sign 17 year old 'wunderkind' Ivan Cokshore, from Aldershot for 800,000 plus add-ons.
''He's definitely one for the future'' says Moylez on signing, ''He's sort of a Cornish Wayne Rooney''. We obviously never have to pay the add-ons as he never makes a first team appearance, but he's great value on twitter

 

[roydo]

Blimey, had a bad weekend??!

 

[Alan Whittle]

Here's my 2do-list for the coming months then. Feel free to add to it.

* Fail to get rid of Vaughan. End up loaning him out. AGAIN. To League 1.

Not yet mate, not quite yet. Agree with all the rest though......apart from losing at QPR. You'll win 5-0 and Warnock will be sacked.....if there is a God.

 

[davek]

This summer is going to see a cull at Finch Farm:

Yobo
Vaughan
Yak
...all confirmed off.

Mucha
Heitinga
Duffy (if Burnley find the cash)
Bilyaletdinov
Rodwell or Fellaini or Arteta
Either Saha or Anichebe

Conservative guess: 7/8 out the door with 5 maybe 6 coming in on lower wages.

 

[Jamo Martinez]

This summer is going to see a cull at Finch Farm:

Yobo
Vaughan
Yak
...all confirmed off.

Mucha
Heitinga
Duffy (if Burnley find the cash)
Bilyaletdinov
Rodwell or Fellaini or Arteta
Either Saha or Anichebe

Conservative guess: 7/8 out the door with 5 maybe 6 coming in on lower wages.

Conjures up images of people clubbing them over the head

 

[davek]

Conjures up images of people clubbing them over the head

Anichebe wont notice.

 

[Jamo Martinez]

Anichebe wont notice.

He probably won't go down. Ha.

 

[tommypotts]

He probably won't go down. Ha.

That would be a first

 

[Philw]

This summer is going to see a cull at Finch Farm:

Yobo
Vaughan
Yak
...all confirmed off.

Mucha
Heitinga
Duffy (if Burnley find the cash)
Bilyaletdinov
Rodwell or Fellaini or Arteta
Either Saha or Anichebe

Conservative guess: 7/8 out the door with 5 maybe 6 coming in on lower wages.

Is this your prediction, or info from a proper source??

If the latter then at least there'll be some actual activity to talk about this summer..

 

[when i score we riot]

Good shout, dave.

I can see Mucha, Duffy and Billy going.
And as far as Heitinga goes, it's more a question of where he goes. Maybe Arsenal is a good call? They wanted Jags earlier, like.

 

[Tubey]

Mucha nailed on. I sort of hope Bily goes for his sake. Duffy, not sure.

Agree with Yobo, Yak and Vaughan going. Rodwell or Fellaini too.

So that makes five or six definites, and I can't see us replacing them, and I'm predicting a relegation battle next year but we'll ultimately finish 15th.

 

[davek]

Is this your prediction, or info from a proper source??

If the latter then at least there'll be some actual activity to talk about this summer..

A prediction.

Lots of comings and goings this summer, I think that's inevitable now. Let's just hope that the incomings aren't all a week into the season.

 

[Kay20]

A prediction.

Lots of comings and goings this summer, I think that's inevitable now. Let's just hope that the incomings aren't all a week into the season.

And the incomings aren't all 18 year olds that'll see the light of day...someday. We need some folks that are ready to play tomorrow. We need a couple of veterans (and I don't mean 34 year olds either).

 

[davek]

And the incomings aren't all 18 year olds that'll see the light of day...someday. We need some folks that are ready to play tomorrow. We need a couple of veterans (and I don't mean 34 year olds either).

I sincerely hope not. I've had it with Moyes' half million pound here and million pound there for kids who cant hack it. He doesn't do it very well - Coleman aside. If money is tight he should dip into the Championship for a bargain or two...his forte.