MACCA75
Player Valuation: £70m
Latest chart is out of our summer arrivals:
1. Sandro. 5th week at the top for the Spaniard who came on and set up the winner for Lyon in a delightfully bad cameo midweek.
2. Michael Keane. This weeks high climber thanks to his game of dodgeball he played against Arsenal. Looks more boyband than centre half.
3. Gylfi ('you are sh1t lad')Sigurdsson. Involved in the game as much as the average ball boy, the Icelander moves up one spot after another anonymous week. Glaciers move quicker.
4. Davie Klassan. The not so Flying Dutchman is rather like his hair. Its there, but it's barely noticeable and you have no idea what it's doing. Further bench time awaits.
5. Cuco Martina. Drops down the chart but through no endeavour of his own. Proved himself as startlingly mediocre at left back as he is on the right, I had time for a toilet break whilst he and Sandro discussed life at Everton with the ball at their feet v Lyon.
6. Nikola Vlasic. Ronald has decided we don't have enough number 10's, so the Croatian has found himself central of late. 'The Vlasic turn', directness and some fancy footwork have made a positive impression.
7. Wayne Rooney. Dropping deeper in the chart, which is a nice parallel to how he plays centre forward, somewhere generally between Pickford and Keane. He has however scored some goals, the only newcomer who even looks likely.
8. Jordan Pickford. Must be having deja-vu from last season. The big summer question of 'yeah he's great with lots of shots raining at him, but can he make a save after having nothing to do for 89 minutes?' remains largely irrelevant.
1. Sandro. 5th week at the top for the Spaniard who came on and set up the winner for Lyon in a delightfully bad cameo midweek.
2. Michael Keane. This weeks high climber thanks to his game of dodgeball he played against Arsenal. Looks more boyband than centre half.
3. Gylfi ('you are sh1t lad')Sigurdsson. Involved in the game as much as the average ball boy, the Icelander moves up one spot after another anonymous week. Glaciers move quicker.
4. Davie Klassan. The not so Flying Dutchman is rather like his hair. Its there, but it's barely noticeable and you have no idea what it's doing. Further bench time awaits.
5. Cuco Martina. Drops down the chart but through no endeavour of his own. Proved himself as startlingly mediocre at left back as he is on the right, I had time for a toilet break whilst he and Sandro discussed life at Everton with the ball at their feet v Lyon.
6. Nikola Vlasic. Ronald has decided we don't have enough number 10's, so the Croatian has found himself central of late. 'The Vlasic turn', directness and some fancy footwork have made a positive impression.
7. Wayne Rooney. Dropping deeper in the chart, which is a nice parallel to how he plays centre forward, somewhere generally between Pickford and Keane. He has however scored some goals, the only newcomer who even looks likely.
8. Jordan Pickford. Must be having deja-vu from last season. The big summer question of 'yeah he's great with lots of shots raining at him, but can he make a save after having nothing to do for 89 minutes?' remains largely irrelevant.
