Post your open Letters to Elstone Here

[Mutzo Nutzo]

Okay chaps - the time for talking is over, the time for action is now! We all know that Elstone haunts this forum, so post your open letters to him here

If you want something to change at our club - then let's hear it

 

[Clint Planet]

We all know that Elstone haunts this forum

Does he? :blink:

 

[Mutzo Nutzo]

Does he? :blink:

*oh yeah...taps nose

 

[Hibbert&Ernie]

'The time to hesitate is through'
Mr Elstone, do you work a 40 hour week? If so what do you do, and what have you achieved in your time so far working for Everton Football Club?

 

[Alio]

Hi Elstone

Are we better off than Villa? We're finding it hard to decide here

Thanks chap x

 

[davek]

Dear Mr Leather Face,

I hope you're feeling refreshed after your last biking holiday *raising charity* for worthy causes (and certaily not using it as a jolly to avoid your responsibilities at Everton).

Can I take this opportunity to ask you to confirm whether the Park End annexe difficulties are now ironed out, or is there still some outstanding issues surrounding the little matter of Everton FC not having the right to pass over land they dont control anymore to a commercial partner? These legal affairs can be difficult to keep track of, I know, so dont feel too bad that you promised something you couldn't deliver on.

Can I also ask whether it's true that those buying season tickets presently are taken into a stadium where they choose their preferred seats by peeling off 'for sale' stickers on each seat, and that there is a sea of these tickets all over Goodison Park indicating a poor take up of season tickets for 2011/12 - and that this might represent a marketing disaster for Everon FC if the pictures of this failed season ticket sale campaign found their way into the public domain?

Sincerely,

Dave K.

 

[Deleted member 28206]

Hi Bobby.

Aston Villa are in big trouble.

I hope you're taking note!

PLEASE DON'T LET THIS HAPPEN TO EVERTON

 

[Deleted member 28206]

Hi Elstone

Are we better off than Villa? We're finding it hard to decide here

Thanks chap x

Damn, beat me to it x

 

[Messner]

Dear Mr Elstone,

I am a Nigerian diplomat with a considerable fortune. Due to political difficulties the Government wants to freeze my assets. If you send me a cheque for one hundred pounds, along with your bank account details, I will transfer the sum of 50 million Nigerian dollars into your bank account, as your payment for this transaction. You may use half of this money to purchase a 20 goals-a-season striker.

Ps. tell my useless waste of space Nephew Victor to pull his ####ing finger out.

Pps. Can you please send me an autographed Tony Hibbert photo with the cheque, my daughter wants to make the babies with him.

Regards,

Mr Obafemi Boomshanka Anichebe

 

[neonleon]

Dear Mr Elstone,

Many fans want change. This board has failed to secure investment time and again, leaving the manager overwhelmed in the transfer market. We believe it is incumbent upon you to facilitate a change in ownership. Portsmouth have had four new owners in the last year alone, and we think this new model of ownership would safeguard the future of EFC and ensure success on the field as well as off it.

p.s We expect miracles and we're definitely willing to stoop so low as criticising the club charity work you do for the Everton Foundation - a community based club charity that amongst other things helps kids in Alder Hey.

Yours

The Kenwrongers

 

[BiggyRat]

Hello Robert.

Pink Floyd once wrote; "Hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way...", is this your philosophy for Everton?

Also, is it true you were out voted when trying to make our 2010/11 away strip Red?

 

[Can't buy class]

Dear Mr Elstone

Apart from getting Mr Stallone to sit in the stands looking like he didn't know what day it was and then appearing with a scalf around his neck on the pitch (marketing masterstoke if ever I saw one and I believe books should be written about this, or even a nice little west end play!), can you please explain what (if anything) you have done in your time at Goodison (excluding messing up and taking a very nice wage at the end of the month).

Also can you please answer the guys earlier who want to know if we are in a better or worse position than Villa!

Thanks

CBC

 

[manxtoffee]

Dear Mr Elstone,

What is your most notable achievement as regards to Everton football club?

Your sincerely

MT

 

[turner]

Dear Mr. Elstone:

Have you ever seen attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion?

 

[davek]

Dear Mr Elstone,

I am a Nigerian diplomat with a considerable fortune. Due to political difficulties the Government wants to freeze my assets. If you send me a cheque for one hundred pounds, along with your bank account details, I will transfer the sum of 50 million Nigerian dollars into your bank account, as your payment for this transaction. You may use half of this money to purchase a 20 goals-a-season striker.

Ps. tell my useless waste of space Nephew Victor to pull his ####ing finger out.

Pps. Can you please send me an autographed Tony Hibbert photo with the cheque, my daughter wants to make the babies with him.

Regards,

Mr Obafemi Boomshanka Anichebe