I have never...
- Thread starter Daveysgingerlovechild
- Start date
Netflix and Prime Eggs, missus watches a lot of 
on there, I'll just watch prime if there's any decent footy on there.
on there, I'll just watch prime if there's any decent footy on there.
I have never been to me.
Tommy Chong
Player Valuation: £70m
Never have I ever... Had a 'Cleveland Steamer'.
If you do not know what that is, PLEASE, for the love of God, do not Google it!
If you do not know what that is, PLEASE, for the love of God, do not Google it!
summerisle
The rain, it raineth every day
I never told the truth when I went to confession as a kid. Talk about rather defeating the object. 
I'll burn in hell.
I'll burn in hell.
Tommy Chong
Player Valuation: £70m
Lol, I never took you for a good catholic lad, mate!I never told the truth when I went to confession as a kid. Talk about rather defeating the object.
When I was a lad, I used to say: Bless me father, for I have sinned. I've had impure thoughts, and have done impure actions.
That covers everything, and you're not lying, right?!
summerisle
The rain, it raineth every day
Just wanted to get out of there, babble a few Hail Mary's and bugger off.Lol, I never took you for a good catholic lad, mate!
When I was a lad, I used to say: Bless me father, for I have sinned. I've had impure thoughts, and have done impure actions.
That covers everything, and you're not lying, right?!
Oh my god, the temptation in your wording..
gotta hide my phone and clear my head..
Tommy Chong
Player Valuation: £70m
Then you're lucky, mate.Just wanted to get out of there, babble a few Hail Mary's and bugger off.
I had an old Irish priest when I was young. Can't remember his name, but he was proper old school, Brimstone & Fire, and all that.
No matter what you'd say, it would always be the same: 'For your penance, say 5 rosaries, lest you burn in hell, lad!'
'5 decades of the rosary, father?'
'NO! 5 full rosaries, ya filthy sinner, and REPENT!'
Don't do it, mate! It'll scar you for life!
summerisle
The rain, it raineth every day
I was forced into being an altar boy for a few months (ringing that little help and wearing a ridiculous costume) until I got pissed off and nicked some candles - they weren't happy. Half of the priests in my church were old soaks.
Times have certainly changed - there used to be six services on a Sunday, now there's just one.
magicjuan
Player Valuation: £60m
Are the priests all in prison now?I was forced into being an altar boy for a few months (ringing that little help and wearing a ridiculous costume) until I got pissed off and nicked some candles - they weren't happy. Half of the priests in my church were old soaks.
summerisle
The rain, it raineth every day
Probably pickled underground.
Charles Hawtrey
Player Valuation: £50m
In Infant school, we used to have a priest come into class on monday morning line the poor kids up and check their fingernails were clean, and ask them if they went to mass on Sunday, accompanied by a cold hard stare... frightened every kid! of course I lied every time.
Tommy Chong
Player Valuation: £70m
There's a joke I use to tell that use to get me in trouble all the time with the family...
There's a priest and a rabbi standing on the pavement outside one of their establishments, and they're engaged in a deep philosophical, religious conversation with one another, when a young boy happens to walk past the pair of them.
And as he's passing them, he drops something on to the pavement in front of them.
So, as he bends over to pick up the object, the priest glares at the lad's supple, young rump, and says: 'Boy! Would I like to fck that good and proper!'
To which the rabbi responds: 'Yes boychik, but out of what?!'
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