Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

[FC sexy xxx]

I'm in a mess right now. An ex-friend of mine died of cancer earlier today. He's been ill for a while and it was really aggressive.

I'm not going to pretend we were BFFs. We had some nasty arguments, and we used to be in a band together and he was one of the members who kicked me out behind my back - long story. I blocked him on Facebook after he made some gross comments about rape. But he was only in his early forties, and we did have some good times together, and I feel sad for his brother and sister. And I'm very weepy because my dad died of cancer. I know I'm being a hypocrite but it really upset me.

It’s not being a hypocrite. Losing people who were once close to is tough regardless how you maybe grew apart. You need to be a bit easier on yourself.

 

[Naisy'sCharitableLeanings]

Try and focus on that job interview mate. The 24th of Jan will be here before you know it. Prepare for it the best you can. A new job could lead to endless possibilities. So as hard as it is now try and focus on that. Go to your family meal too, it could be rubbish or it could be a laugh. Maybe tell one of them how you have felt being not asked to go the panto.

Christmas/New year is a hard time cos you're expected to enjoy it and be happy. It's almost done with and you can bounce back to how you were feeling two weeks back. Try and keep strong mate. Maybe get yourself back home now though.

I find it helpful to always make a point of having something to look forward to, even if it’s something small like a favourite TV programme or favourite tea. I agree @EFCPaul - this job interview can be the thing you look forward to.

 

[Naisy'sCharitableLeanings]

I know where your coming from with the second bit. I have two young children and I used to think that I would insist on them supporting Everton. Now though, if one of them told me they wanted to support a different team I'd just shrug and buy them the shirt (anyone other than the RS I mean lol).

In hindsight, one of the best things I have ever done as a dad is not insisting on my son getting into football and following my team - he’ll never know how grateful he should be!

 

[EFCPaul]

Nice one for the kind and thought-provoking words people, I'm alright just having one of my episodes I think. My head is so far west at the moment it's somewhere in the Atlantic. Right now I think all I can do is just let the cards fall where they may and try to make the best of things. Just focusing on the interview on the 24th is what's best so I'll try to do that. Later on I'll head the gym for a work out, that usually helps me feel better.

Thanks.

 

[1874]

Good support network on here, and it’s good to see. Always liked this forum, one of the better ones. Mental health is not attention seeking, self harming is not attention seeking, and I get so annoyed with ignorant views towards mental health, and drug and alcohol addiction, which comes under the same thing imo. I’ve suffered with addiction for years, which has caused me to have bad anxiety. It’s been under control over Xmas, but when it’s bad it’s bad. It’s good that people can have a place to open up where they feel comfortable, and without being abused. I know so many people that suffer with mental illness.

 

[1874]

In hindsight, one of the best things I have ever done as a dad is not insisting on my son getting into football and following my team - he’ll never know how grateful he should be! lol

Just started taking my son the villa with me, and he loves it. He’s 6 years old. Can’t see him supporting anyone else tbf. He’s got a soft spot for City, but hates Liverpool and Wolves, which is good with me. Don’t know why he dislikes those teams if I’m being honest, because it hasn’t came from me.

 

[Armaghtoffee]

As I get older I can’t wait for Christmas.

Lights up and house decorated from 1st December, Christmas songs in the house and all that.

Each year taking decorations down is harder. The downer that it is all over.

My positive self says it is reliving memories and enjoying my kids waiting for Santa and their delight on the big day.

I love that, feel that’s what I am here for, to start them off in life with good memories and the best chance I can give them.

Just don’t know how I go from childlike joy for a month to being down.

Mass helps though, I love the togetherness and everyone happy and chatting on the way out. That’s probably my answer right there amongst my rambling.

 

[efcforever]

As I get older I can’t wait for Christmas.

Lights up and house decorated from 1st December, Christmas songs in the house and all that.

Each year taking decorations down is harder. The downer that it is all over.

My positive self says it is reliving memories and enjoying my kids waiting for Santa and their delight on the big day.

I love that, feel that’s what I am here for, to start them off in life with good memories and the best chance I can give them.

Just don’t know how I go from childlike joy for a month to being down.

Mass helps though, I love the togetherness and everyone happy and chatting on the way out. That’s probably my answer right there amongst my rambling.

I definitely feel a case of the post Christmas blues coming on myself.

 

[spence03]

I personally can't wait for 2019 to start and even then it won't be a celebration it will just be relief that a [Poor language removed] year is over.
I'll be perfectly honest and for the first time in admitting to anyone I've contemplated suicide but I haven't had the balls to carry it out.
I'm not a happy person now but I'm also not suicidal. I have no idea about the future but my daughter, work and you lot on this forum being there for me when I've been an absolute mess and a miserable sod have carried me at times.
Thank you all for your support and hard work.

Keep going mate. Tough times don't last but tough people do. I think in response to your other post a loy of people will have similar experiences about football, being hard-core to almost not caring.

All the best for 2019.

 

[Tipp blue]

I definitely feel a case of the post Christmas blues coming on myself.

I used to get a bit down after Christmas, haven't done for a few years now, I found that if you have something to look forward too, say in mid January then it softens up the period after Christmas, maybe a concert or comedy gig, I'm going to see Les Miserables on the 12th of Jan and I'm really looking forward to it.

 

[blue to the bone]

I used to get a bit down after Christmas, haven't done for a few years now, I found that if you have something to look forward too, say in mid January then it softens up the period after Christmas, maybe a concert or comedy gig, I'm going to see Les Miserables on the 12th of Jan and I'm really looking forward to it.

I'll be glad when Christmas is over..
January can be a long month but I'm goin over to the Bournemouth game on the 12th so that's something

 

[FC sexy xxx]

I used to get a bit down after Christmas, haven't done for a few years now, I found that if you have something to look forward too, say in mid January then it softens up the period after Christmas, maybe a concert or comedy gig, I'm going to see Les Miserables on the 12th of Jan and I'm really looking forward to it.

Same here . I’m off to London on the 17th for an NBA game ( not a big fan really but always wanted to do a game ) then I’ll stay down there for Southampton away . A little break takes my mind of this time of year . I don’t really care about Christmas but it depresses more than anything. So when it’s over and I have something to look forward to it definitely helps . If that makes sense.

 

[Vegas Toffee Girl]

As I get older I can’t wait for Christmas.

Lights up and house decorated from 1st December, Christmas songs in the house and all that.

Each year taking decorations down is harder. The downer that it is all over.

My positive self says it is reliving memories and enjoying my kids waiting for Santa and their delight on the big day.

I love that, feel that’s what I am here for, to start them off in life with good memories and the best chance I can give them.

Just don’t know how I go from childlike joy for a month to being down.

Mass helps though, I love the togetherness and everyone happy and chatting on the way out. That’s probably my answer right there amongst my rambling.

One year I left my Christmas decorations up until March. My husband was deployed at the time, so I left them up to keep the holiday cheer going a little longer.

After that I started adding little white light strings around the windows, on the fireplace mantle, and a ficus tree that was in the house. Not only does it add more light, but they add a cheeriness to the house all year round.

 

[David09]

A neutral Man United fan? Whut?

Keep going mate. Tough times don't last but tough people do. I think in response to your other post a loy of people will have similar experiences about football, being hard-core to almost not caring.

All the best for 2019.

Thanks mate. All the best to you too.

 

[zzr45]

Odd morning. Found out a girl I was involved with about 18 months is in a relationship and happy. Really done me in as I messed her around a lot, but she was someone I was always happy to be with.

Firstly, I’m kinda down that I didn’t get my s*it together and move things on with her. That’s my bad. More though I’m disgusted in the way that I did treat her, she’d of literally gone to the ends of the Earth for me and at times I treated her like utter crap. I used to blame her for things that weren’t her fault at all, when we hadn’t seen each other for a couple of weeks and she wanted to come and see me, I told her she was being crazy, when really she just missed me. She loved me and I totally abused it.

Self reflection is horrible. I’m glad she’s in a seemingly better place than where I left here, half cut off in a conversation about why I couldn’t come over.

Again, no pity, feel better for writing it and somewhat processing the guilt, hopefully won’t keep me awake trying to solve those problems with hindsight.