Our worst Premier League XI

[john_r]

Inspired by the best-of thread and for a bit of a laugh.

Plenty of absolutely sickeningly horrific footballers to choose from. Many because they simply lacked any ounce of talent, others because they were washed-up and well past their sell-by date, and others who cost a bomb and delivered nothing.

Without putting too much thought into it (it's late) and trying to use a blend of the above criteria...

Espen Baardsen

Peter Degn - Per Kroldrup - Antolin Alcaraz - Cuco Martina

Yannick Bolasie - Claus Thompsen - Andy van der Meyde

Paul Gascoigne

Stewart Barlow - Brett Angell
​

Subs:
Sander Westerveld (humiliating)
Ashley Williams (in his final season)
Li Weifeng (forced on us by Kejian)
Oumar Niasse (couldn't even give him away)
Sandro Ramirez (see above)
David Ginola (five years earlier maybe..)
Marc Hottinger (just remember him being awful basically).

Over to you lot.

I think Bolasie is a bit harsh... he looked promising until he got that injury. I‘ll never forget the woman, who knows sod all, who sits behind me moaning every week, shouting “get up you” when he was obviously badly injured.

 

[mccole]

In terms of money and poor talent

Simonsen
Heitinga
Bilic
Kroldrup
Bilyaletdinov
Bolasie
Nyarko
Klaassen
Bakayoko
Tosun
Niasse

Must be closer to £200m there

 

[Noble Savage]

Turner/Simonsen

Degn, Krodlup, Tiler, Tony Thomas

Williamson, Mitch Ward, Simon Davies

Sandro, C.Tosun, Niasse

No-one’s topping that ^

Williamson, what a damn shame .
Was Tiler that bad ? I know he had the turning circle of a WW1 tank stuck in a ditch but he wasn't that bad .

 

[dead_soft]

Nyarko must get in somehow?

whilst I don't want to get too revisionist and suggest he was phenomenal. I felt in his first spell he was below average but so was everyone and it was the shirt swapping at Arsenal that turned him into one of the worst players of all time in many people's eyes. When he returned from loan he was okay and may well have stayed on if his work permit hadn't expired.
Definitely wasn't a high spot for Everton but, purely as a player, wasn't the worst we've had

 

[Lloydystark]

Having Gazza in that midfield is a complete joke, given some of the crap we have had, he should be nowhere near this team. Some alternatives, Alex Nyarko, Stephen Hughes, Simon Davies, Tobias Linderoth or mitch ward.
Also I don't feel Niasse is worthy of a place, he has scored goals for us and got us out of some tight spots. Some would say his winning goal against Liverpool for Hull makes him one of our best buys and well worth £14m. I would offer up in replacement; Ibrahima Bakayoko or John spencer

I agree, Gazzas name shouldn't

GK Jason Kearton
RB Paul Holmes
LB Cuco Martina
CB Per Kroldrup
CB Antolin Alcaraz
RW Mitch Ward
LW Peter Degn
CM Claus Thomsen
CM Simon Davies
CF Brett Angell
CF Stuart Barlow

I could probably do a second worst eleven considering some of the poor players we've been lumbered with in recent decades.

About right with that 11

 

[DanEFC92]

Iwobi and Anichebe have to be in there

Poo shout.

 

[Loadsofchemistry]

In to defend gemmil and Tiler when they inevitably get put into these worst ever sides like they usually do. neither was that bad atall yet still end up in countless peoples sides. Ive never understood it.

 

[MACCA75]

In terms of money and poor talent

Simonsen
Heitinga
Bilic
Kroldrup
Bilyaletdinov
Bolasie
Nyarko
Klaassen
Bakayoko
Tosun
Niasse

Must be closer to £200m there

Nonsense to have Heitinga anywhere near that

 

[MACCA75]

In to defend gemmil and Tiler when they inevitably get put into these worst ever sides like they usually do. neither was that bad atall yet still end up in countless peoples sides. Ive never understood it.

I’ve seen Keane and Davies have many worse games than these two for starters.

 

[Loadsofchemistry]

I’ve seen Keane and Davies have many worse games than these two for starters.

I always liked gemmil for us. Just wish he took a chance and played a through ball a bit more often because he had it in his locker. As for Tiler there were worse centre halfs in the squad he was in let alone ever.

 

[ClausThomsen]

In to defend gemmil and Tiler when they inevitably get put into these worst ever sides like they usually do. neither was that bad atall yet still end up in countless peoples sides. Ive never understood it.

Gemmil was a player who never stood out but was never noticeably terrible. I always thought Tiler did OK for us given the situation at the club. There were worse players in the squad at the time.

Neither would get anywhere near a half-decent Everton 11 but they aren't in worst 11 territory. Just played during some of the worst years at the club.

 

[DannyEvo]

Mate, I know he hasn't really hit the ground running and I've been vocal over my concerns, but there is no way he's anywhere near our Worst XL... at all.

The same could easily be said about Victor: not great at all, but nowhere near the bottom of the pile. I've watched some real dross over the last twenty-eight years!

Genuinely mate, I’m of a similar age to you and Alex Iwobi and Victor Anichebe were/are two of the worst footballers I’ve ever seen play live, let alone just for Everton.

 

[DannyEvo]

Poo shout.

Iwobi is the worst “winger” or “AM” I’ve seen play for Everton.

 

[ClausThomsen]

GK Jason Kearton
RB Paul Holmes
LB Cuco Martina
CB Per Kroldrup
CB Antolin Alcaraz
RW Mitch Ward
LW Peter Degn
CM Claus Thomsen
CM Simon Davies
CF Brett Angell
CF Stuart Barlow

I could probably do a second worst eleven considering some of the poor players we've been lumbered with in recent decades.

Barlow did hit the net a few times and was always an option to cause problems. Far worse forwards than him - Sandro for instance.
I'd put Klassen in ahead of Simon Davies as well. Maybe drop Mitch Ward and put Stefan Rehn in there as well.

 

[PhilM]

Genuinely mate, I’m of a similar age to you and Alex Iwobi and Victor Anichebe were/are two of the worst footballers I’ve ever seen play live, let alone just for Everton.

I meant I’ve watched the PL for twenty-eight years from its outset: for my sins, I’ve had the pleasure to watch the blues for many decades now.

Personally, neither of them are anywhere near the bottom of the barrel and let alone in the PL era.