You can almost see Don Howe on the sidelines.
"When you get it, don't be messing about kick it, kick it as far as it is from here to Austria. When they get the ball back, time waste a bit and then POMO it, lump it up to the big lass up front, the one who looks like Bella Emberg with the teeth missing"
"But Don, these are highly trained, professional athletes, they're not Risley rejects".
"Don't care, lump it up to Myra Hindley"