Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

[Kurt.]

Been reading back a few pages.... I empathise with each and every one of you , plus anybody who knows what I'm about would know I'm not being dismissive of depression or mental health in general . ...but, depression is a very insular condition... The individual alone becomes the priority...sometimes to the detriment to others and often to themselves .... It has been described as a selfish condition at times . A lot of posts on here are of the nature of "woe is me... Why is nobody helping me "
I realise that sounds awful and I honestly don't intend it to be but sometimes reality dictates we each need to take some personal responsibility... If you don't know how to help yourself how can you expect others to have the answers ? ... It's extremely difficult I know but ... And as hard it seems... That first spark of recovery has to come from within. Every bodies journey will be different... But it's up to to an individual to want to take that first step so others supporting you can walk your journey with you.... With you... Not for you.... I wish everybody in here someway conquers their demons and can make them difficult steps one by one but it has to come from within.

 

[faddy the blue]

I haven't had any tragedy in life nor do I do drugs that ultimately leave you so low. But I don't know sometimes, I'm doing fine with a touch of emptiness but. every now and then the emptiness gets overwhelming and then I feel really hopeless/lonely/sad and wonder where the hell am I headed with life in general. Last winters was the height of it, when I exploded in severe anger towards my brother and parents for no reason to the point that they got scared. I then locked myself in the room so that I put a chain on my anger. Looked in the mirror and burst into tears for the first time as I can remember. When I reflect upon it, I realise that at times even when I feel I'm alright there's a part of me that tries to put on a positive facade cos no one wants to see a 23 year old feeling depressed for no apparent reason.

 

[Groucho]

I haven't had any tragedy in life nor do I do drugs that ultimately leave you so low. But I don't know sometimes, I'm doing fine with a touch of emptiness but. every now and then the emptiness gets overwhelming and then I feel really hopeless/lonely/sad and wonder where the hell am I headed with life in general. Last winters was the height of it, when I exploded in severe anger towards my brother and parents for no reason to the point that they got scared. I then locked myself in the room so that I put a chain on my anger. Looked in the mirror and burst into tears for the first time as I can remember. When I reflect upon it, I realise that at times even when I feel I'm alright there's a part of me that tries to put on a positive facade cos no one wants to see a 23 year old feeling depressed for no apparent reason.

Speak to your GP mate.

 

[erikdi]

Some really great tips here as well: http://themindunleashed.org/2014/11/10-forgotten-truths-help-get-hard-times.html
I recommend following them on facebook, if you're there. Good articles almost every day.

 

[trebilcock66]

I haven't had any tragedy in life nor do I do drugs that ultimately leave you so low. But I don't know sometimes, I'm doing fine with a touch of emptiness but. every now and then the emptiness gets overwhelming and then I feel really hopeless/lonely/sad and wonder where the hell am I headed with life in general. Last winters was the height of it, when I exploded in severe anger towards my brother and parents for no reason to the point that they got scared. I then locked myself in the room so that I put a chain on my anger. Looked in the mirror and burst into tears for the first time as I can remember. When I reflect upon it, I realise that at times even when I feel I'm alright there's a part of me that tries to put on a positive facade cos no one wants to see a 23 year old feeling depressed for no apparent reason.

Depression is an illness. There doesn't need to be sadness in your life or a tragedy (although those things can trigger depression for some people) for you to feel depressed. Thankfully the Health Service is slowly getting wise to the fact that mental health is every bit as importnat as physical health....but we do not understand the mind as well as we understand the body.

I'm sure you're right - people might judge you for being down. It's because they don't understand that depression strikes indiscriminately....you can't control it. Groucho's advice is sound.....see a professional. They will not judge you but should treat you as they would somebody with backache. Hopefully.

Very quick story that may give hope to some readers. Ran my own business for 18 years and thought it would be the making of me. One of the worst decisions I ever took... I was hopeless. Couldn't organise money or get new customers. Took me 15 years to accept that I couldn't carry on (and a lot of heartache, accepting that my life's ambition wasn't going to work).

So I started to look for a proper job again. But by now I was too old and out of practice. I looked for 3 years.....lots of rejections....lots of painful dashing of hopes. I got down. Then felt worse. My Dad passed away. Still plugged away with the jobsearch.

Until I tripped over a vacancy earlier this year for which I am tailor made. Fast forward two interviews and I got offered the job.....three years after I started searching.

Now I have started to regain my self esteem. Bank balance is on the mend. I walk a little taller than I used to.

Hope was what sustained me....that kept me going. Cling on to that if you're feeling desperate.

But most important advice is: do not suffer alone. Go and see a professional and you can start the long walk back. If you think it's going to be easy....think again. But it can be done.

 

[ically]

Just a brief update,

I have recently been on 20mg of citalopram and have now attended 5 weeks of and 8 week therapy course,
The combinations of these two have been a tremendous help to me and am now in a position to return to work,
Although my work was the initial cause of my depression, i feel I might be able to get back to where I was 6 months ago,
The doctor,myself and work have agreed for me to go back on reduced hours starting on the 1st December,
I have no illusions that I am fully right in myself, but definitely feel better about myself, I even notice that I can now smile(which is a weird sensation, when you haven't done it for so long)
My message to all in need,is seek professional help, don't be embarrassed or ashamed to ask for it, there are people all over the place who will help you, including on here!, You are most definitely not on your own.
I think I have bottomed out and am on my way back,although I will be on medication for the foreseeable future, I can see ways forward.

Thank you to all on here for your good wishes,It meant a lot.

 

[edge]

Just a brief update,

I have recently been on 20mg of citalopram and have now attended 5 weeks of and 8 week therapy course,
The combinations of these two have been a tremendous help to me and am now in a position to return to work,
Although my work was the initial cause of my depression, i feel I might be able to get back to where I was 6 months ago,
The doctor,myself and work have agreed for me to go back on reduced hours starting on the 1st December,
I have no illusions that I am fully right in myself, but definitely feel better about myself, I even notice that I can now smile(which is a weird sensation, when you haven't done it for so long)
My message to all in need,is seek professional help, don't be embarrassed or ashamed to ask for it, there are people all over the place who will help you, including on here!, You are most definitely not on your own.
I think I have bottomed out and am on my way back,although I will be on medication for the foreseeable future, I can see ways forward.

Thank you to all on here for your good wishes,It meant a lot.

good luck mate, and dont be tempted to come of the tabs to soon, or put to much pressure on yourself to be all of a sudden be cured you will still have good and bad days its normal .

 

[ically]

good luck mate, and dont be tempted to come of the tabs to soon, or put to much pressure on yourself to be all of a sudden be cured you will still have good and bad days its normal .

Thanks mate,
I won't put pressure on myself, i know I'm still "Fragile" and will have setbacks on the way, but hopefully they wont be as bad as the last 3/4 months have been.

 

[Groucho]

Just thought I'd mention that with xmas coming up, please remember that you can always reach out here.

Xmas can be a horrid time if you're less than 100% so don't hesitate, pipe up and help is here, and we can always signpost you to the relevant stuff if you need professional help.

Don't suffer in silence folks.

 

[RAFUH]

@Garrick posted this in the Donovan thread, but I figured many wouldn't see it there. I thought some coming here might find it relevant or helpful .....regardless your thoughts on his talents as a player.


Even a man that seems to have it all going for him (rich, famous, professional footballer, supportive family) can struggle....

http://www.mlssoccer.com/news/artic...legacy-challenging-stigma-mental-health-word?

 

[JP McMurphy]

My elder brother took me to my first Everton game and later moved away. He was an Everton fanatic (maybe too much) and, although it can't be blamed for his depression, the Blues in the 70's really couldn't have helped. Sadly he took his own life, shortly before Kendall (one of his heroes) took over.
I always wonder, if he had managed to find help and got to see the great side of the eighties, how differently his outlook would have changed. It just proves (though I don't mean to trivialise the illness) that we don't know what's waiting around the corner; hope can be a lifesaver so we should never stop believing
BTW, my avatar shows one of the greatest songwriters in history, who walked away from a life of fame and wealth, into no one knows what; he was a victim of mental illness which is just as fatal as any physical illness, but less understood

 

[BiggyRat]

My elder brother...

There was certainly a stigma attached to mental health issues in the 70's, that much is certain. It's good that you still think of him though...

I always wonder, if he had managed to find help and got to see the great side of the eighties, how differently his outlook would have changed. It just proves (though I don't mean to trivialise the illness) that we don't know what's waiting around the corner; hope can be a lifesaver so we should never stop believing

Every individual will react in a different way to external stimulus and there's no telling what effect the 80's Everton side could have had on him, but a big positive in one's life could've made the difference.
Hold onto that memory of your first game & cherish it!

 

[bizzaro]

This time of year is the worst for feeling a bit under the weather. Seasonal. Due to the shorter days and less daylight.

Some recommendations. Make sure your house is nice and comfortable and bright (but don't overdo it) but relaxing light of an evening until 10 pm. Then have lights on dimmers or put lamps. You simulate natural daylight/dusk more then.

Make sure the place is warm and relax a bit with some good (not necessarily junk!) food.

Spicy food is nice for cold weather.


People may laugh. But some people are sensitive to the changes in daylight more than they realise.

 

[GwladysBlue]

A few weeks ago I could feel myself heading into a horrible phase of depression again and it was noticeable with family etc pestering me as to what was up.

I've started my driving lessons and got back into doing fitness etc and can honestly say I feel much better. Having something to preoccupy your mind outside of work/personal life is a great thing to have.

Having a goal to achieve e.g passing my test has given me a massive break.

 

[Deleted member 28206]

Just want to say every time I read everyone's comments be it good news or opening up that little wound of secrets in which we keep our depression in it makes me feel so proud and I always say that as much as i can offer is a chat or whatever always feel free to PM me. I've been through a lot and have a fair few war stories to bore you with if you feel a bit low - that in its self for me is therapy.