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Thread: MATCH THREAD: Norway Vs. England - Euro 2012 Warm Up Match

  1. #1
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    MATCH THREAD: Norway Vs. England - Euro 2012 Warm Up Match

    Lord Nelson! Lord Beaverbrook! Sir Winston Churchill! Sir Anthony Eden! Clement Attlee! Henry Cooper! Lady Diana! Maggie Thatcher - can you hear me, Maggie Thatcher! Your boys took one hell of a beating! Your boys took one hell of a beating!
    So it begins....

    Our (that's right 'our') boys head to Norway for Roy's first game in charge. Yes, it's a friendly, yes it's a bit pointless, and yes Baines will probably play.

    What do you think of when you think of Norway? It's the crappest of the Scandinavian countries isn't it? Iceland has Bjork, Sweden has IKEA and hot chicks, Denmark has the original Lego Land, and Finland has The Finn Fan. Norway has:
    Well done Morten well done.

    As a football nation they have had some good times against England, most times when England have had people like Geoff Thomas and Gary Charles playing. That reminds me of a game me and mate used to play. How many players can you name who's last name is also a first name? We started that game in 2005 and it's still going now.......JOHN TERRY.



    Norway didn't make Euro 2012. Denmark and Portugal smashed them all over the show and they finished third in their group.
    Having said that they will still take this game seriously as they love getting one over on us and giving us one hell of a beating.
    Stand out players for Norway will be Morten Gamst Pedersen (Chico says he's joining us) and Mohammed Abdellaoue who sounds about as Norwegian as Bluejock. As you can guess they aren't packed with stars anymore. John Carew doesn't even get a game nowadays.



    So, England. Christ knows to be honest. The Chelsea players haven’t joined up with the squad yet so (are they still drunk or what?!) that should see Lescott and Jones at the back I would think. Baines at left back and it wouldn’t surprise me to see Jags at right back as Glen Johnson is a bit poorly or something. It seems international managers think he can play there even though he's better in goal than in that position.
    No matter who plays, no matter what result, Roy Hodgson will be under major spotlight after a meaningless game. The players are coming out saying they know how he wants them to play, so it will be interesting to see if Roy has just said 'remember that Italian bloke and how boring we were....yeah? play like that/don't play like that'. Delete as appropriate there.



    Let's spare a word for John Ruddy. Broke his finger in training so is out of the tournament. Gutted for him as he's become more than a capable keeper since he left us. He will be replaced by Jack Butland. That's right, Jack Butland who played for Cheltenham Town last season is going to the Euros. Kept 11 clean sheets in 24 games last season........in League 2. In case you don't know he looks like this:



    He won't play anyway so stop taking the p*ss other nationalities. I bet Laurent Blanc doesn't know who he is either. Sacre bleu.

    Win, lose or draw this, it doesn't really matter. Despite what the press say afterwards. Wins breed confidence though and that's something this England team needs as it is lacking in talent in nearly every department. Especially in the forward line. Let's hope this guy forgets who is and where he came from.....



    INGUUURLAAAANNNNDD INGUUURLAAAANNNNDD INGUUURLAAAANNNNDD INGUUURLAAAANNNNDD
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  2. #2
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    Oct 2009
    Chico wannbe ;)

    Decent write up , but this is gonna be a dire match with too many RS players for my liking

  3. #3
    Bergen is an ace, if a tad expensive, night out so far that reason, Norway 3-0 for me.

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by Caveo View Post
    Chico wannbe ;)

    Decent write up , but this is gonna be a dire match with too many RS players for my liking
    It's more of a warm up as i'm doing the games in the Euros mate.

    And yes you are correct with the second bit.
    @ijjysmith (Twitter) - @backtotheeighties (Instagram)
    OFFICIAL GOT JAMES MCCARTHY MISANTHROPIST

  5. #5
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    Aug 2008
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    Good write up Ijj

    Gonna watch Liverpool vs London FC as I am bored stiff without football or Everton
    Quote Originally Posted by chicoazul View Post
    I bet it takes like nectar down there.

  6. #6
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    Nicely done ijjmaster

    Genuine question. When is it?

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alio View Post
    Nicely done ijjmaster

    Genuine question. When is it?
    Tomorrow 7:45 KO i think.
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  8. #8
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    Ha, really? Cool, I will be watching then

    A few Birmingham fans at work reckon that Man City, Arsenal etc have all been trying to get that Keeper they loaned out to Cheltenham, they think Foster will be out in the Summer and Butland will go back as their number 1. He could technically play for England before he's played for Birmingham, interesting. Should be good experience for him if nothing else

  9. #9
    Join Date
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    Setting off fireworks in the bathroom with Balotelli ffs
    Well in Ijj.
    ****. DO TELL.

    BALOTELLI JUDGES KEV.

  10. #10
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    went to watch wales 4-1 norway in one of their last games, if england don't win by more hang your heads in shame

  11. #11
    Quote Originally Posted by Alio View Post
    Ha, really? Cool, I will be watching then

    A few Birmingham fans at work reckon that Man City, Arsenal etc have all been trying to get that Keeper they loaned out to Cheltenham, they think Foster will be out in the Summer and Butland will go back as their number 1. He could technically play for England before he's played for Birmingham, interesting. Should be good experience for him if nothing else
    Doesn't Foster play for West Brom and Brum's no 1 is Myhill? Oh, I've actually just looked it up. Last year Birimngham had west brom's goalkeeper on loan and west brom had birminghams. How odd.

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Artetafan View Post
    Doesn't Foster play for West Brom and Brum's no 1 is Myhill? Oh, I've actually just looked it up. Last year Birimngham had west brom's goalkeeper on loan and west brom had birminghams. How odd.
    I read the first line of your post and thought, yeah, hold on, what the hell have I just written? Ha

    Very bizarre

  13. #13
    Didn't even know this was tomorrow...always nice to have a bit of footy when you're at the pub, even if it is Bloody Ingurland.

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by Summerskin View Post
    Didn't even know this was tomorrow...always nice to have a bit of footy when you're at the pub, even if it is Bloody Ingurland.
    Where you from Summerskin?
    ****. DO TELL.

    BALOTELLI JUDGES KEV.

  15. #15
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    Pure plagiarism.

    Your (that's right 'your') boys will get one hell of a beating... ;)

  16. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Equaliser View Post
    Pure plagiarism.

    Your (that's right 'your') boys will get one hell of a beating... ;)
    Git!

    This was just a practice go!
    @ijjysmith (Twitter) - @backtotheeighties (Instagram)
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  17. #17
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    There's nothing I love more than using that infamous commentary after Everton have just stuffed someone 1-0

  18. #18
    Quote Originally Posted by Alio View Post
    There's nothing I love more than using that infamous commentary after Everton have just stuffed someone 1-0
    It's just the best bit of sports commentary ever. Both heartfelt and hilarious. Plus as a fan of the England football team, it's quite sweet that there's someone who viewed us as important enough to get that excited about beating us.

  19. #19
    Join Date
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    Hope Norway bum them.
    I'm trying to see the light, but the Devil tryin to blind me


    Quote Originally Posted by potato View Post
    personally i would like us to sell fellaini and sign maloney

  20. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bryan View Post
    Hope Norway bum them.
    I hope Norway bum you like 8-0 or something
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    OFFICIAL GOT JAMES MCCARTHY MISANTHROPIST

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